confused

1 minute read time.

Well, it's nearly that 3 month check up time again.  Why is it that one day you feel on top of the world, with nothing going wrong. full of the joy of spring, and the next day you have a pain and the reality comes crashing in again?  Monday I was out shopping for new clothes for the summer, had my wedding ring made bigger (a job I have been putting of as 'not worth it if I'm not going to be around for long), booked my appointments and felt fit and healthy and looking forward to a long summer of being out and about..... Thursday comes round and I've got a pain, that makes me feel tired, and even though we went to look at a new motorhome, (something we've been talking about for several years), and I should be on top of the world, by the time we get home I have a lousy headache and feel like (and do, have a good cry).  What do my feelings count for  when looking to buy a new van, when I probably won't use it for more than a couple of years?

Is it the check up coming round that is making me feel like this, or is it really on it's way back. I know that it is the first time f or 3 years that I have had longer than 3 months remission, but is it all in the mind, or in the body as well.  Sometimes I feel so confused.

Please can I go back to how I was feeling at the begining of the week.

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember
    You are doing so well Badger. I always get anxious when I'm due for a check up and get the odd twinge think its down to the what if it's coming back. Hope the check up goes well and you can start to enjoy your new van. Life is for living so pack up your van and enjoy yourself you deserve some good times. Rosie xxx
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hugs Viv - the check up leaves us all very nervous - I certainly am and yet have been clear since the first lot of chemo and not have had the long journey like you have.  It is always the "what ifs" at the back of our minds and the waiting for the results.  Your plans seem fantastic - go for them xxx

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Thanks for all your support.  I went to the relexologist and came home feeling much more relaxed, mst admit to still be worried, but much calmer after her treatment.  We bought the new van, so lots to look forward to, I can't afford the time to be bad this summer.  I will eventually get my cuddle from my new grandaughter in August when she comes over.

    I'll be fine.... after the 30th!

    Love n hugs to all

    Viv

  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Thats really nice to know. As I know staying calm helps in recovery, so is having strong positive feeling about the outcome. There is a whole phenomenon called placebo effect in medicinal world.

    Beliving strongly that you are recovering will lead you to recovery. Even if the reality is other wise.