Helping me make sense of my husband's throat cancer diagnoses.
No particular direction but my own random ramblings in my own peculiar way,
just telling our story.
I am so very fortunate to be loved so dearly by my darling husband. We have so much to be thankful for. We are saying our slow goodbyes, reflecting on our lives together and gaining strength from one another on this our final togetherness. We talk much of love, our love, still "in" love after all these years.
My wonderful brave soldier. My comforter, my advisor.
How I will wake each day without you I do not know.
You are still hanging on in there, some hours better than others. But I see the decline now, as I know you do too.
Take my strength darling and hold on as long as you possibly can but as I have always promised you from the very beginning your quality of life is the only priority. It hurts me to see you restless, to see you uncomfortable at times. But we still have those moments of pure love and pure joy. They will keep me going I'm sure in the dark days ahead.
I can only hope now that you are peaceful at the end.
My rare and gentle husband, my rare and gentle friend.
My brooch arrived today that you have bought me. It was a perfect choice, you will never know how much that will mean to me. You said it will protect my heart when I wear it and keep me safe. You want it to give me strength on my dark days. I will try my sweet, I will try.
I feel so very fragile tonight. xx
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