My Lovely Lady Lumps

1 minute read time.

That song will never be the same to me again, not that I liked it in the first place. Breast lumps. They are still there. I am still concerned.

So I've been to see the doctor. She agrees that I am indeed developing more dodgy lumps that weren't previously there and aren't shifting either. She still doesn't know what to do. My bloods came back abnormal but a different abnormal to my usual results so she's sending an urgent fax to my haematologist to see if he wants to see me or whether he thinks I need to see the breast people. She thinks the haematologist will probably say 'not me govn'r, I'm blood not boobs' but we shall see. Frankly I'll happily whop off my bra for any medical professional willing to have a crack at working out what is causing them and then promptly getting rid of them! Oh you're a podiatrist you say? Yeah, worth a go. Anyone got a scalpel? 

As before it's the uncertainty I am wrestling with. I want her to say, no we are sure you are just one of those people with exceptionally lumpy breasts OR yeah it's shit but we'll start throwing poisonous chemicals at you like they're going out of fashion to fix it! I am having nightmares again though this time thry aren't as obviously lump related...I appear to be accidentally killing people, stealing pets, featuring in multi coloured people's music videos and adverts for 80s TV shows. All normal stuff right?

Now however, I am off to work to fix a fake smile on my face and attempt to be a productive member of society.

Anonymous
  • FormerMember
    FormerMember

    Hi mad girl, sorry to read about the return of the lumps. How are the wedding plans going?

    Mimi has her second 3 monthly check up next week, so fingers crossed, only cloud on the horizon is the menopause has kicked in and big time!

    First it was the hot flushes now the mood swings, due to the cancer she can't have HRT, so one moment its tears next I'm public enemy no 1 ! Only just managed to stop her from chucking £1100 of Mac book across the room the other day, she gets like a toddler having a paddy. Its OK, I just take my weekend car out for an early morning blast down the A21, don't know if you or hairy are petrol heads? Just before she became ill I treated myself to 2004 Jaguar XK 4.2 V8 if you don't know its the one that often gets mistaken for an Aston Martin, well it was designed by Ian Cullum who designed the DB7. Sorry being a car bore.

    At the risk of sounding like a stalker, your the only one I follow on this site, Your post are always amusing and insightful. I guess you remind of a younger Mimi.

    We will keep our fingers crossed for you.

    Take care.

    Gingercat & Mimi.