My son

I want to say thank you to everybody who read my blog and took the trouble to comment. It helps - it definitely does. My husband, my mum and I have been round their flat today, as they are moving on Saturday to a new flat, and we are helping them clean,etc. Doing something practical for him really helps - so I stopped at Tesco's on the way and bought them good, healthy food so he can build himself up. He's like a beanpole. You may think 'why isn't his wife doing that?' Well, it's complicated. He went travelling in S.America a couple of years ago, and he met a girl in Peru and fell head over heels for her. He stayed out there for 3 or 4 months, and got a job teaching English (he speaks Spanish), but eventually came home last March because financially he needed to get a 'proper' job here to pay off student loans. We thought he'd forget about her, but he didn't, and against our advice, (not that we had anything against her personally, we just thought it a bit rash) flew out in August last year and married her. (She had applied for a tourist/ student visa but been rejected - our country is really hot on S.American visas) Anyway, once they had all marriage cerificates etc, they applied for a married visa, and she finally came over last November. All this was going on whilst I was battling with 2 ops, bad news every which way I turned. But he was so happy when she came over. It is obvious they adore each other, and I'm so glad he's got her, but she's like a beautiful little Spanish dolly. She is actually 1 year older than him (25) but she'd never been out of Lima before, never lived away from home, never really worked (she was at Uni in Lima) and she's just so sort-of childlike. Her mother did everything for all her children - she didn't know how to clean,cook, pay a bill, drive, and while we feel quite fond of her now, practically, she isn't much help. I know she understands that he has to build himself up, and she does cook for him now, so its not that I'm being an overbearing mother or anything, she's just learning how to do all these things very gradually. She goes to English classes on Mondays, and her English isn't bad. But I feel sorry for her also. Married only 10 months and facing this. My son is being amazingly strong. Privately we are in bits, but I'm trying my best not to show it in front of him. The tumour is so bloody big - 11cms. You can feel it if you press his stomach. I get panicky sometimes. I'm terrified about him having the op - I was cut from breastbone to pubic bone - but on the other hand, it can't come soon enough. These tumours are very slow-growing, so probaly been there for years. We are going to see the surgeon on Friday. Will update then. xx