Thanks for all your PMs and your replies on my last blog. I have finally decided not to take anymore rubbish from any one especially Kev and he knows it, he knows where the front door is, if I have to do this alone I can and I will. I am a strong person but like every other adult there is a child within me wanting to be loved, cut me and I bleed the same as anyone else, and yes I do cry, bloody hell, I have cried buckets over the last two and a half years. Maybe Kev is scared, his dad treated his mother like this when she was diagnosed and she died within two weeks and he regreted it and he died a year later, surely a person would learn from that. It is not the quantity but the quality of life that counts and we could have the best few years of our lives right now, I could even out live him, because the amount he drinks and smokes and being diabetic. Yes I don't have a set time limit on meeting my maker, it could be any time but life is for living and that is what I have to do with him or not. When I am well, he is ok but when I am not it is like I should have a bell around my neck, shouting 'unclean'. I learnt from a very young age that a smile, a touch can make all the difference to a person, I learnt that from nursing my dad at the age of 10 until 12 when he died and saw and did things that no child should ever see and do and that is the reason I fight this so hard, I hate cancer with a passion, it is deep rooted with me but even the Bird is entitled to some happiness now and not to be treated like this. Blimey, that is masterfull!!!!!! Sorry guys, but this is what happens when I get angry it makes me even stronger and more pig headed!!!!!!
I am going to the Leicester Fiesta so I should have calmed down by then and be my usual crazy happy go lucky self, so look out Leicester. I love life and I love laughter and I am not dying of cancer, I am living with it. Love and hugs to those who want them as usual......Carol x PS I have to go now coz I am making Bramble Jelly YUM!!!
