Hi all, this is my first ever post. I have been told its good to share and i'm going for it. A month ago my lovely wife Iryna was diagnosed with stage 4 NSCLC. She's 38, never smoked, always ate healthily, so when we went to find out what was causing her relentless cough and found a malignant 9cm by 6cm tumour in her right lung it was a massive shock.
The Surgeon and Oncologists at the Royal Marsden and Kingston Hospital have told us there is not much they expect to work. They wanted to put Iryna on an aggressive course of Chemo and Radiation, and attempt to shrink the Tumour, with a chance afterwards of surgery to remove her lung completely, followed by more Chemo, but they are not confident this will work. Iryna has decided she does not want to go through this, and I am supporting her decision. She is instead doing a natural therapy called the Gerson Therapy. I am extremely happy she at least has some hope, and is in a positive state of mind.
We have two young children, girls. Anais is 7, and Sasha is 2. They are wonderful little girls and one of the hardest things to come to terms with is what they are going to go through over the coming months/years. The first two/three weeks after we were diagnosed was a living hell. I have been strong for Iryna and the girls, but privately I cried a lot. I took a few drives in the car and shouted and sweared. I cried. I ran through every eventuality in my head. I worried about finances. I worried about the girls being defined by what is going to happen with Iryna. I worried about facing life without a partner. I worried about Iryna suffering and whether I could be strong enough to help her through whatever may come.
I realised that I needed help coming to terms with all of this and have had some excellent counselling. I now feel that I will be able to cope with the journey, no matter what the outcome, and life after Iryna dies, whenever that may be. The doctors have told us 12-18 months. I'm praying for a miracle but at the same time preparing for the worst. Its a lot to confront. I am so thankful for the great friends I have in Surbiton, who are really supporting me so that I can support Iryna and the girls. Im grateful for an understanding work, who have given me time off and are allowing me flexible working with such compassion. I'm steeling myself to get through this somehow, be a good dad, a good husband and find a way to get through this.
Thanks for listening.
