Melanoma

A support group for anyone affected by melanoma to come together, share experiences, and ask questions.

Possible melanoma, feeling a bit lost.

DAAD
Posted by

Hi  

I too was in shock when we had hubbys diagnosis and i felt more stressed than he did I think .He's always been the positive 1 .

But once every thing are  explained  and treatment is discussed and underway it will be easier .

Specialist nurses are there for the whole family so let your hubby know if he needs answers to anything just call them. They are so supportive and understand from all sides how family feels 

Parts are difficult & you will need your support network but you do get through it . 

Fingers are crossed for happy outcomes for whole family happy shopping 

I love retail therapy

Big hug

latchbrook
Posted by

I'm pleased to hear that you're doing okay

I was fortunate that my husband came with me to my appointment so he heard the news from my consultant at the same time as I did. It must have been hard for you having to break the news to your husband.

If you just have a WLE then it will be done under a local anaesthetic and it's almost exactly the same procedure as when your mole was removed. Whether a skin graft is needed or not depends on if there is enough skin for the plastic surgeon to be able to close the wound without pulling the skin to tightly to close it.

There are guidelines in places which advise the surgeon how large a margin to take (usually between 1-2cm) depending on the depth of your melanoma. Were you told the depth of your melanoma, also known as the Breslow thickness?

If you are offered and elect to have a SLNB then this and the WLE are done at the same time under a general anaesthetic.

x

 "Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"

What is a Community Champion?

Fannyfayefaffington

Hi, latchbrook 

thanks  for the info it’s good to know what the next step is .unfortunately I do not know the Breslow thickness.

LA doesn’t bother me ,I haven’t  had  GA since I was 5 years old for a tonsillectomy. but I will probably have the SLNB if offered.I’d like to know rather than wait for symptoms.

This has been one of those years last November I had several biopsies for breast cancer but in the end All ok.

then in March I has an endoscopy to confirm a hiatus hernia.

I'm menopausal and flushing most of the night,I’m trying really hard to be positive.

As the saying goes ’ Start each day with a positive thought and a grateful heart’

thanks again 

xx

 

 Best wishes FanyFayeFaffington.
Fannyfayefaffington

Hi DAAD,

Thanks for sharing that. It is really hard for everyone not just the patient.

my sister battled for 13 year with breast cancer and lost her fight 12 years ago. So I’m aware of the impact on others around me ,that’s what makes it so hard because I don’t want to upset them. But my husband is my rock and he’s being very supportive not too gushy as otherwise I would be a wreck .he just seems to know.

By the way retail therapy but the way was a huge success considering I was only there ‘to have a look around’ ha ha.I bought two jumpers a skirt two trousers and a Yankee candle, 4 Christmas presents, for work colleges, oh and a pair of slippers , didn’t I do well!

hubby did get his shirts and we had a spot of lunch. After cooking Sunday dinner, finished the day off with watching Sanderton on tv.

thanks again for sharing.

hugs to you xx

 Best wishes FanyFayeFaffington.
latchbrook
Posted by

Gosh, you've been going through it this last year!

You could always give your skin cancer nurse specialist (SCNS) a call and ask her what stage and thickness your melanoma was as that way you'll know if you'd be eligible to have a SLNB before you meet the consultant. There are advantages and disadvantages of having one and I'm providing a link to NICE's decision aid which you can use to help come to a decision with your consultant.

Let us know how you get on

x

 "Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"

What is a Community Champion?

Bellflower
Posted by

, I've been away last week and have just seen your news. I am so sorry to hear it turned out to be melanoma :(( I can't even begin to imagine how shocked and probably scared you must be but I really hope they have caught it at the early stages and can treat you easily. So glad you have the support of your husband and friends and you are doing the right thing by keeping busy. Here to chat anytime you need. I have my surgery tomorrow and although i'm scared of the procedure itself and the pain that might follow I just want it done and to have my results asap as the wait is killing me. Massive hugs to you, you are so brave and you will get through this X

Bellflower
Posted by

Well my surgery has just been cancelled!! There is a shortage in dermatologists apparently and they have no idea when one will be available!!! I am absolutely livid that they gave me less than 24 hrs notice, I've had to cancel big plans and take precious time off work. Plus the surgery is urgent and delaying it is not going to do me any favours :((((

Bellflower
Posted by

Hospital said they will try and rebook me within 2 weeks but they can't promise anything!!! I tried explaining the urgency but the nurse seemed completely unfazed. Could a delay in excision be life-threatening? Should I try and go private knowing that my private insurance won't cover any of it because i've only joined them 6 months ago and had the mole for 2 years so I would need to pay thousands of pounds but obviously I am not willing to take any risks if the NHS doesn't care. Grateful for any advice. 

Katybb
Posted by

Aw  that’s rubbish news - I can totally understand how frustrated you are, it’s a nightmare trying to sort work (and life!) out ready for surgery. 

The lead up to my surgery felt like forever, when I just desperately wanted it all gone, so I can imagine how scary a delay is. Try and keep things in perspective though before you rush in to paying thousands. You said the mole had been there for years already, and you’ve had a biopsy which should have taken a big chunk of it (if not most) already.

Are you currently at a general hospital rather than a specialist hospital? I wonder if it would be worth a conversation about what timelines might be like if your care was transferred to a specialist hospital - if that’s even a possibility...? I’m just thinking there might be less chance of cancellations if there isn’t an A&E attached with constant new urgent cases. I know nothing about it though, so might be utter rubbish! And I guess it might ultimately lead to more delays if you have to wait for a new MDT meeting and pre-op assessment and the like... Yes, very frustrating. I can’t imagine that even going private you’d be booked in any quicker than 2-weeks though?

Have a glass of wine and a good cry - although I expect you’ve already done that bit already! Deep breaths.

xxx

Kate

Bellflower
Posted by

 thank you for your help. I haven't had a biopsy, the doctor said she wanted a full removal of the mole as soon as she saw it and she managed to book me in for surgery within 10 days which I thought was great. I am absolutely shocked that the hospital decided to cancel my surgery the night before and not even offer me a new date. I feel hugely let down and any hope I had is now replaced by uncertainty and dread.  

Yes I should have surgery at a general hospital, the only specialist hospitals I am aware of are private clinics where I would normally have gone had my private insurance company agreed to treat me. 

Anyway, I will try and calm down now. I just had a go at my son and I feel horrible. I don't even know how I would cope on a day to day basis  if this turns out to be cancer. 

Thank you xx

Katybb
Posted by

I see - so at least there’s still a glimmer of hope it’s nothing serious - not that that will put your mind at rest. Not knowing is the worst! Fingers crossed you get rebooked quickly.

Big hugs Xxx

Kate

DAAD
Posted by

Hi  

I can understand your frustration. But do try not to over thing the what ifs .

waiting for any treatment & results are really hard at any time  but they would not have done this unless there was no alternative & also they feel that it would not be detrimental to your health . They will rearrange soon I’m sure.

So hard to do but try to stay calm . Working will not change the outcome & you could have made yourself stressed for no reason . As I said it’s so easy to say . Take 1 step at a time . 

sending you big hug & wishing you good news soon  xx 

Fannyfayefaffington

Hi Bellflower 

So sorry to hear your operation was cancelled,I’d be furious too!

hope you don’t have to wait too long,it really is the worst of it , Yep I’m scared of the pain too!as you know I’m waiting for the next step to find out what stage etc I’m at ,like you I want to know so I can plan.

I’m fine keeping it all locked up inside most of the time ,that’s until I tell someone ,and their face  drops they say all the nice things you expect  .Like your fit, your strong, your young  be positive etc ,then I well up and cry.getting loads of hugs which is lovely ,but it’s horrible at the same time to see them get upset as well.but I’m really lucky have all the support.

still dreading telling my boys ,sometimes I’m talking to hubby and we have to change the subject quickly when they walk in the room.

fun day today hubby had a hospital appointment turns out he’s probably got a torn shoulder ligament ,may need surgery.

Hey ho ,life’s never dull in our house.

so chin up Bellflower we’ll  get through this together.

thanks for your kindness,I’m not brave- just a bit scatty and doing the best I can,

I’m here for you too xx

lots of extra hugs for you (or cwtches as we say in wales)

 Best wishes FanyFayeFaffington.
latchbrook
Posted by

Oh, that's not good   and I'm not surprised that your first reaction is that you're livid and you're thinking of paying to have it removed privately.

I do totally understand how upsetting waiting for surgery can be but the fact that your excision was cancelled at such short notice suggests that an emergency probably happened. I know that's no consolation to you but if you've had this mole for a number of years another week or so probably won't make any difference. Ideally lesions should be removed within 2 weeks of referral but this doesn't always happen. 

Six months ago I was down to have another suspicious lesion removed (turned out to be nothing) and I too had my op cancelled at short notice and rearranged for a couple of weeks later. The plastic surgeon who was doing it turned out to be a specialist in burns surgery so I then realised that my surgery had been cancelled because someone was in more need of his expertise than me.

If you don't hear anything from the hospital in a couple of days, you could always give the dermatologist who referred you for surgery's secretary a call and explain that your op was cancelled and ask if another date been arranged yet.

I hope that you get another date quickly.

Sending a supportive ((hug))

 "Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"

What is a Community Champion?

Bellflower
Posted by

Thank you all so much for the kind words of support and the hugs :)) It really helps to talk about it and I am feeling better today. Still waiting for the nurse to call me back with a new appointment date but they'll probably just send a letter. 

, I am sorry to hear your husband is also dealing with health issues and hope they can fix him without the need for surgery. 

I have another worry and I hope I'm just being paranoid. About 3 weeks ago my index toenail turned a funny blue/purple colour out of sudden. It wasn't painful and I don't think it was bruised either. I forgot to mention it to the dermatologist who examined my mole. I didn't think much of it and last week it started to go back to a normal colour. The nail looks almost completely fine now apart from a small brown spot or stain under the nail which upon googling images looks similar to subungual melanoma. I am freaking out a little here. Could I have ALM and subungual melanoma at the same time? or could one develop into the other one? This is not on the foot where I have the mole by the way. Any ideas?