Melanoma

A support group for anyone affected by melanoma to come together, share experiences, and ask questions.

My husband is taking dab and tram for metastatic melanoma and I really miss our love life

VeronicaP
Posted by

I read the drug advice leaflet and it says no unprotected sex. How serious would it be for me? 

VeronicaP
latchbrook
Posted by

Hi 

I'm not taking these drugs so looked up the information about dab and tram on this site to see what it says. If you scroll down to the heading of 'sex' it says "If you have sex during this treatment, you need to use a condom. This is to protect your partner in case there is any trace of the drug in semen or vaginal fluids."

So you don't need to miss your love life, just use a condom.

x

 "Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"

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KTatHome
Posted by

Hi , my first treatment was Dabrafenib back in 2015 (the combo was only available as a trial back then), but it had the same warning. I was relieved to be starting any treatment but the rules of when you can and can’t eat and about protection just adds yet more stress into a stressful situation. I am a rule follower, and also felt a bit like rabbit in headlights at the time and so blindly went ahead with all rules I wouldn’t have wanted to put my husband in danger even if there was only a slight risk.... but I haven’t asked your question but if you wanted to there is an ask an expert section (click on the link)

https://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer_experiences/ask_the_expert/

I might suggest the general ask a nurse but consider the ask about sex men’s cancers, I am not sure if she only deals with men’s cancers or wether she’s would have experience of the awkwardness of asking some questions and the emotional and libido side of things that your partnership might be feeling, and could pass the question on to someone else if she felt it was more appropriate. I did a search and the question hasn’t been asked. Protection takes some closeness and spontaneity away from the situation and it’s yet another thing to growl about, especially if your other half doesn’t want to be considerate to you, or feels that consideration is unnecessary. I read your profile where you mention your age (a tiny bit older than me) and cheekily thought the use of condoms may bring back some youthful memories, so perhaps things aren’t all bad! 

It will be interesting to see if others are happy to give there personal experience of discussing the emotional side of things. (I don’t recall it being discussed in the last few years, and there are now far more people on this drug). 

KT 

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KellDani
Posted by

Hi

I have had an appointment today to talk abut going on this medication. My mind at the moment is in complete overdrive! 

How is your husband finding it? Side effects?

Any help would be amazing! 

Thanks :) 

VeronicaP
Posted by

He seems to be doing really well! After only a few days the visible lumps on his back had shrunk, which made him feel a lot better.

Most side effects have been manageable: some diarrhoea and gas, some skin rash due to not being careful enough re sun.

However there was one episode of rigors which necessitated a visit to A&E and stopping treatment whilst on antibiotics to treat chest infection. In fact this was a continuation of a previous infection (before the dab and tram started ) that had not totally cleared up.

He had only been taking dab and tram for 4  days then. Now been on them for 6 weeks solid and feels great. Back to walking 10 miles several times a week which is his big love. 

Still early days of course.

I wish you all the best, enjoy life as much as you can

VeronicaP