Hello all,
i spend most of my sleepless nights reading through these forums but I thought I would try a post.
I am 25 years old and my 30 year old fiancé was diagnosed with Stage 4 lung cancer late last year. To say it was a shock is an understatement, we are both completely heartbroken.
He is well into his treatment plan of chemo and immuno and the last CT scan showed that the cancer had not spread any further.
When he was initially diagnosed he took several months off of work sick, but he has recently gone back to work full time. since starting back at work he is just so tired all of the time and I am worried he is over doing it.
understandably he is constantly worrying that his health is deteriorating, and is very paranoid about any aches and pains he has. I try to keep him positive, but he is just so down all of the time. How do I help him?
He wants to start looking at us buying our first home together. We would both be first time buyers and I worry that we would not be given a mortgage due to his health. Does anybody have any idea about this?
I lay awake most nights thinking about losing him, and I feel like I am grieving for him before he is gone. I am trying to make every day count with him, but I am so scared about losing him that my grief is taking over. I am exhausted trying to be upbeat and positive around him all the time. Whenever I am going through anything difficult, he is the one person that I confide in. But he is already going through so much that I just can't tell him about my feelings.
sorry about my endless rambling, it's just nice to write all of this down!
Hi half_of_me, I am so sorry you find yourself here, you and your fiancé are both so young as well. I am glad to hear that the treatment is going well. Is your fiancé able to reduce his hours at work whilst he is still undergoing treatment?
As a cancer sufferer I know how I think every single ache and pain is going to be something sinister. This is something that does seem to stay with us I am sorry to say. Anything that is of real concern to your fiancé should really be checked out by a health professional.
It is lovely to have plans together, and it would be lovely if you were able to buy a home. I don't know how having cancer will affect getting a mortgage, but you can ask this question in the ask the expert section, I'll pop a link below.
You can also speak to someone about this by calling the Macmillan support line on 0808 808 00 00. They are available 7 days a week from 8am until 8pm.
