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Kidney cancer

A place for people affected by kidney cancer to support one another, ask questions, and share their experiences.

Wee update on my dad & a bit of a pre-surgery panic!

Jess1308
Posted by

Hi Sue,

Thank you so much for your well wishes and all your replies so far! I think it's going to be a long day but glad this part of the treatment will be over soon! 

Best wishes,

Jess x

Gragon
Posted by

Hi ,

I have nothing much to add to the good advice you have received to date but would just like to echo everyone else and wish your dad all the best.

Gragon xx

Deb1234
Posted by

Hi jess, 

I will be thinking of your dad today, sending love to you too and luck to dad 

Debs x

Jess1308
Posted by

Hi Gragon,

Thank you so much for your well wishes :) Currently just willing time to hurry up a little, it's crazy how it seems to speed up and slow down in all the wrong places! 

Best wishes,

Jess xx

Jess1308
Posted by

Hi Debs,

Thank you so much for your well wishes and thoughts :) They really do mean a lot, and I'm definitely going to let my dad know about all the kindness he's received on here today, I really think it might help.

Best wishes,

Jess x

piper952
Posted by

Sending best wishes for your scan tomorrow 

A

piper952
Posted by

Sorry this is for scubacrazy

Jess1308
Posted by

Not at all! Seconding the good luck for Scubacrazy tomorrow, hope all goes well! :) x

piper952
Posted by

Thinking of you and your dad too obviously x

Scubacrazy
Posted by

Not wishing to hijack the thread obviously.

I will post any results I get as soon as I get them  
But thanks for all your best wishes 

I’m doing this the only way I can. One day at a time. 
Jess1308
Posted by

Thank you so much :) Really looking forward to telling him all about the well wishes he's received, I think it might boost his spirits tremendously, especially when he's feeling sore and groggy! x

buttercup01
Posted by

Good wishes for tomorrow

Sue

Fear of the unknown is the worst thing. Once we know what we're facing, we find the strength to deal with it.
CMGAZ
Posted by

Hi, Jess

I’ve been following your posts and have only just plucked up the courage to post something. My Dad has recently been diagnosed with a 5cm tumour on his left kidney, we are still waiting for a surgery date. I hope that your Dads op has gone well and that the recovery isn’t too painful. Let me know how he gets on, would appreciate any tips to pass on to my Dad both pre and post op.

Jess1308
Posted by

Hi ,

I'm so so sorry to hear about your dad and I hope you get a treatment plan soon. Aside from getting the news in the first place, I think waiting has definitely been the worst thing thus far! Especially at this time of year!

was going to update this thread a bit later as I haven't seen him yet and can't give a first-hand account - my dad didn't want us to see him unconscious and with tubes in him so it was just my mum who went to see him immediately post-op - but I'll try and be as detailed as possible, and from what I've heard, everything went super well! The main scary detail was that it had grown further into the vena cava from his last scan, which was only a couple of weeks ago, and I think the tumour itself got slightly bigger too. The surgeon also said the tumour was sticky? I'm still a little confused about what that means (if anyone is reading this and knows, I'd be very interested to find out!), but even with it being a bit bigger and stickier they're confident they got everything out with zero complications! They also opened him up further to check around his thorax, just in case it had spread and they missed something on the scan, but luckily everything was clear there, and if it wasn't, the plan was to cut it out straight away. From the sounds of it they were very thorough, and they took all the unexpected bits in their stride, surgeons really are incredible!

It also didn't take as long as I thought, he went in for around 7am, had to get an X-ray and then meet with the radiology team to block off the blood supply to that kidney (which did take longer than expected because my dad had three vessels they needed to block instead of the usual one, but that's just a weird thing my dad has :')), met with the anaesthetist, and was in surgery at around half eleven, coming out at around half three. I honestly thought we weren't going to hear anything until about five, so I was very relieved! He then went to HDU, which I believe is the step down from ICU (but happy to be corrected, not 100% sure!), and my mum saw him a little later as friends and family aren't allowed to go in immediately. When she saw him, he was going in and out of consciousness (which I understand is normal) until nearer the end of her visit, when he started to ask for his phone and glasses and things, and apparently he said that he's feeling better already. Still sore and groggy from the surgery, but otherwise good! He did have a blood transfusion afterwards, so he'd lost a wee bit of blood, but from what I understand, they're quite common. This morning, he's going to meet with a nutritionist (which I am VERY happy about) and a physio, plus they're moving him to a ward. He's also going to be hooked up to an IV which gives you food, so hoping he puts on a little weight! Just waiting now to see what happens with drug treatments, but the doctor said at least not for another month.

In terms of what it was like pre-op, my dad's symptoms might be different to your dad's ones, so I don't know if this will be useful! But for my dad, not eating and weight loss were the biggest ones, coupled with a bit of fatigue, and that got really bad over the course of this past week, which I think we might be able to chalk down to the tumour getting bigger in addition to nerves. My dad said that with eating, it's like he's got these windows where he can eat, but they go by quite quickly, so we kind of had to pretend that we were on a cooking programme with a time limit! Sometimes he'd get his meals if they were simple, like cereal, or he'd ask my mum for a takeaway on her way home from work and she'd drop everything and run out to get him something (usually a kebab, he had really weird cravings for them :')), but if something needed cooking, we'd try and cook it as soon as possible and bulk it out with cream and cheese or he'd just go past it. This might not be the biggest symptom with your dad though, we were told that because of his weight loss, we could basically throw healthy eating out of the window because calories were more important than veggies, but I'm not sure how advisable that would be otherwise! 

I don't really know what to do about the fatigue. He'd go out a couple of times a week to the shops to stretch his legs, but other than that, he'd wake up super early at about 4am and he'd feel great until 9/10ish, then the day is usually spent napping on and off. Even though I think that's expected to linger for a while, I'm hoping it'll improve a little now the kidney is gone! 

Other than that, I think that pre-op, the most important thing is to stay positive for your dad but also you as well! I'm naturally a very anxious person and I catastrophise all the time, so even though it's impossible, do try and stay away from google! My dad is very similar to me in that sense, only without the googling! I like to find out everything but he'd rather not know anything, which I do understand, but not everything we've been told is bad, so I usually just give him a summary of the good things the doctors have said, leaving out tumour size and staging and things like that. In any case though, being on here is much healthier I think, and it makes you realise that things are often more complicated than just statistics! I really wish I could give everyone who's responded to my posts a huge hug because it helps so much, and I wish I knew more so I could help you out a bit better! If there's anything more specific you'd like to ask, I'll do my best to answer, and I'm sure other people will offer their experiences too. 

Yesterday was a scary day, and SO long, you're thinking of all the little things that could go wrong even though they're rare, but the doctors take all sorts of precautions in case something goes wrong, even for things I (thankfully) didn't find on google! Hopefully, if the cancer hasn't spread, surgery might even be the curative answer to your dad's cancer, and the size of it seems much smaller than my dad's, so he may even be able to have keyhole surgery which I hear have shorter recovery times. In any case, I'm sure your dad's medical team will be on the ball, and I hope you get a plan as soon as possible, I know waiting around feels dreadful. 

I hope this is useful in some way! It's hard at the moment to give any 'tips' for post-op as he's only been in for a day, but if anything pops up, I'll update

Wishing all the very best to you, your dad, and your family, and thank you so much for your well wishes

Best wishes,

Jess x

CMGAZ
Posted by

Thank you so much for replying Jess. It’s helpful to speak to someone who is in a similar position. I am also an anxious person and can’t help but to search the internet for information as I like to feel that I’ve some idea what they are talking about.

The waiting like you say is the worst part, your life’s on hold and you’ve no control in what or when things will happen. We are all trying to remain positive and to keep my Dads spirits up. I’m always popping in with chocolates, sweets or anything high in calories to make sure he’s eating something.

I’ve also found it strange being in reverse roles with my Zmum and Dad, they are usually the ones to support and give us strength to get through difficult times and now we are the ones offering the emotional support. 

I’m hoping that in the next week or so he will have an appointment date for surgery. 

Sending a hug your way and best wishes that your Dad has a speedy recovery.

Keep me posted on his progress.

All the best

Claire