Head and neck cancer

A place for people affected by head and neck cancers, including oral, throat , larynx (voice box), salivary glands, middle ear, and sinus and nasopharyngeal cancer. Support one another, ask questions, and share experiences.

Whats next - scared daughter

Itsmelou1984
Posted by

My mum was diagnosed with scc of the tongue back in march, april she underwent 2 operations (14hours long and 5 hours long) feeding tube fitted, talking slightly, completed 33 sessions of RT in Leeds, which finished 6th August... we were ment to be on the journey out of all this but unfortunately mum gained a sore under her neck..along with a lump on the opposite side of her neck. Tests and scans have confirmed cancer is back.. even after a double neck dissection, letter to state NED...how?! Why?! Its now in her throat, has a tumour on her right collarbone, specks in her liver. She is 72 years old, chemo and surgery were no longer an option. Palliative care nurses are coming to see her today for the first time. I'm numb, I'm very unprepared, I feel like a vulnerable child again (I'm 35 with 3 daughters) dads at home with her, hes been amazing. My elder sister spoke to the consultant after we left and she asked how long...its my mums birthday the 24th December...consultants reply was "people usually hold on for certain dates". We may not get to see mum this christmas then...

What now 

Beesuit
Posted by

So sorry this has happened to your mum and your family. I can only imagine how things are. 
You might find the “Living with incurable cancer” group helpful. 
I’ll keep you in my thoughts 

chris2012
Posted by

Hello Itsmelou, so sorry to hear this news, i cannot really offer much advice, as Beesuit said maybe post in the incurables' group as there are some lovely people there who I'm sure will be only too pleased to help. You will find that the palliative team will be the nicest people as i found this out with my mum who had terminal gall bladder cancer, they do a wonderful job. All you can do is make life as easy as possible for your mum and she gets the treatment for as long as possible. Sending special wishes to you all, take care .xx

                                                                                               Chris x

Its sometimes not easy but its worth it !                Click here to find out more

Itsmelou1984
Posted by

Thankyou both for your replies, I was having a bit of a moment yesterday and went into a little panic mode.. the nurses were really lovely and calmly spoken, very caring and listened to everything. She explained how theres only 6 palliative care nurses in our city and she covers 4 of them areas! So she must be a busy woman. This next part of the journey isnt what any of us expected, so will take each day as it comes x