hello all u amazing people. I have been reading your posts and have found them so uplifting. I am feeling really low right now : in brief,routine mammo in May led to BC with bone mets. Lumpectomy followed by mastectomy and full lymph node clearance. Now finally having radiotherapy to chest wall.
I can't seem to feel positive at all. Am I just going to die soon? Is there any point to it? Please share your positivity with me!
my best to u all xx
Hi there boo girl,
just read your post, and to be honest I wasn’t going to reply as I’m not sure I can be uplifting or cheery-uppy, as your mood reflects mine. Then I thought, well, maybe saying ‘yes I know how you feel but don’t despair ‘ might be a help. No it’s not the end, there’s loads of treatments you can have and it’s started with radiotherapy which should alleviate a lot of pain. Get those meds down you, too, to help you to relax. Things are working fairly fast for you, too, from the sound of it, so the docs seem on the ball.
This is the beginning, and your moods will be all over the place. Have something nice every day even if it’s just a biscuit. Try hard not to dwell on the worst part of it all; watch daft tv, read a lightweight book, and don’t plan big stuff - just nice small stuff.
not sure I practise what I preach! But we’re not done yet, boo girl. Hope others will be more positive than I am.......over to you all.
best wishes, Krystyna
For I have promises to keep, and miles to go before I sleep. And miles to go before I sleep. Robert Frost
thank you so much for your positive thoughts. They mean more than you can know right now. Not been a good day today but tomorrow is a new day. You are right... It's too easy to feel overwhelmed. Keep it small keep it simple.I do hope you can be positive too.please let me know how you get on. You have a friend.
my very best to you
everything your feeling is normal and it’s utter shite,
you will have a million questions and the thought of death and dying is never far away, I push that to the back of my mind as much as I can and when I have a bad day and to be honest my bad days are always when my pain gets too much and I get so bloody angry that I can’t do what I used to I cry in anger and sheer frustration and sometimes the pain... just had my CT today and your on that bed literally 10mins but me trying to get off today was nigh on impossible and I sat and cried in the scanning room, I felt pain and embarrassment and I hate fuss so I was mad at that too... I was 50p short for the parking meter so had to walk the long way and cos it was dark I cried all he way to the car.... I then drove myself to boots and put my face back on and spent 50 quid on myself!!!
Tomorrow will be a better day! So that is about what I let bother me... try not to dwell on things too much, keep busy and keep on top of any pain meds, don’t be hard on yourself or expect too much, it’s ok not to be ok and it’s ok to say it to people who care for you, I hope you have family and support as it’s so important, Krystyna I hope you feel better soon, this seems to be hanging on you not being your normal happy self... but it shows we are all just human and can’t keep the smile upwards all the time.... but the majority of the time we can, and yes radiotherapy changes my life... back to walking upright after a couple of weeks... we will always be here for you boogirl for support, advice etc
regards Jo xx
thank you for your lovely reply. I don't know why I was so unsure about joining the online community ...wish now I had done it months ago. You are all so understanding and know exactly how I am feeling. I have great friends but they haven't been thru this. I find myself forcing myself to be "normal"
i know what u mean about stupid things annoying the hell out of you. I hope all is going well for you. Do we have any long livers with bone mets? What do we know collectively?
My very best to you to u all
thank you so much for your lovely reply. It is hugely appreciated. Can I ask what hormone med are u on ?is it letrazole? If it is do u get side effects? What have you been told about your bone mets? I seem to have conflicting views between the various medics treating me.either very optimistic or doom and gloom time.
thank you for being there. I really do appreciate the virtual hugs. Am feeling the love and sending mine to you all
You're correct I'm afraid Elanora. Once cancer has spread to the bones it is classed as incurable. HOWEVER, incurable does NOT mean terminal. It's something a lot of people get confused about at the beginning, so I just wanted to make that clear.
There are indeed some amazing treatments out there these days, some of which have been so successful for some people that they can live their lives as if they don't have cancer at all - just a couple of pills to pop a day or something.
So it's def not time to despair or to get the coffin catalogue out. You'd be better off getting the summer holiday brochure out to see where you might fancy next year. Because by then, you might be up for a wee jaunt somewhere, even if it's just a weekend in the countryside somewhere - or city if you're a country mouse. Lol.
Got to have things to look forward to and aim for, that's how you keep going.
Hope is important because it can make the present moment less difficult to bear. If we believe that tomorrow will be better, we can bear a hardship today. - Thich Nhat Hanh
Hi there, so good that you are feeling a wee bit better, you can always rely on Lass to lift you up. She has been a great support to me since I joined the forum, which is a super resource. We will get there together, wherever that may be!!!! Be strong. Xxxx to
Yeh, there's a lot to get your head around at the beginning of each step you need to take, or every new obstacle thrown in your way. But with a bit of time, you'll get there - you just need to make sure and ask your questions.
So a top tip, get yourself a notepad just for questions. Jot any questions down as you think of them in there. Then, you can either ask them here if they are general ones, or ask them at your appointments if they're specifically about your own condition. Just make sure to either leave space between questions so you can write the answers, or use a double page spread with the questions on the left and answers on the right.
That way, while it won't necessarily go in then and there - you'll be able to look back on your questions and answers if you wonder something again.
And pffffft Krystyna, I did nothing you don't do yourself.
And speaking of making plans to look forward to...... how are Christmas plans coming along for everyone? Who is doing what?
thank you for your encouraging thoughts! Sorry I've not been online for a while but finding radiotherapy hard to deal with as have a filthy cold and chest infection to boot. As the treatment is quite high up my neck,it has caught my throat which is dry and crackly. Such fun.
i love reading everyone's posts....I am not alone!! Power to you all.
yes this is a crap disease but we are not giving in!!!
love to all
shows how crap I am at technology I think I have posted a reply further down the thread.
just wanted to say a huge thank you for your support: can't wait for treatment to be over.
just a question dear readers.....anyone had trouble getting travel insurance? Best company to try?.
thank you for your response. Might try the bank actually. Had one quote today for £570 for a 12 day holiday. Hmmm.....
hope you recover well from the radio. I finished mine today. Not sure how I feel.
I hope you don't mind me dropping in but I noticed your post about travel insurance. I'm not sure if you're aware but there is a travel insurance group where you can see which insurance companies other forums members recommend for travel insurance.
To join just click on the link I've provided and then choose 'Join This Group' on the page that opens. Once there scroll down to the thread entitled 'Recommended Travel Insurance' (currently 2nd from the top). If you look through that thread you'll see which insurance companies other forum members have recommended.
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
What is a Community Champion?
Safe payments by:
We're here to provide physical, financial and emotional support. So whatever cancer throws your way, we're right there with you.
© Macmillan Cancer Support
© Macmillan Cancer Support, registered charity in England and Wales (261017), Scotland (SC039907) and the Isle of Man
(604). Also operating in Northern Ireland. A company limited by guarantee, registered in England and Wales company
number 2400969. Isle of Man company number 4694F. Registered office: 89 Albert Embankment, London SE1 7UQ. VAT no: