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How to help my husband , MIL battling breast cancer

PearceyL
Posted by

Hello everyone

Ive joined up to Macmillan as I'm looking for some help/guidance as to how to support my husband through a really hard time. His Mum is currently battling stage 3 breast cancer. She has had surgery and is undergoing chemotherapy which has just become a lot harder on her due to a change in the drug used, which has made her considerably more poorly.

Bit of background info he is only child and very close to his mum so the diagnosis was just a terrible shock for him (as it would be for most) he lives about two hours away and we have young children. He is afraid to visit her in case he passes anything on and we don't go up to visit at the moment for fear of our little germ balls making her poorly which is very hard for all of us.

Up until recently he seemed to be coping ok, but of late he seems increasingly angry/agitated over little things causing us to argue, I tried talking to him a few days ago as we had both been upset for days and he has apologised, and told me he has been crying in his car when out at work and feels very sad but says there is nothing I can do or say as he knows chemo is ultimately trying to save her etc so even when I try to talk to him about it he doesn't really want me to.

I was just wondering if anyone had gone through this scenario? maybe there isn't really anything else I can do but just be there but it is so hard knowing how to help him through this

rily
Posted by

Hello and welcome to the community. We know how a cancer diagnosis does not only affect the patient, but has far reaching and emotional effects on friends and loved ones. Your husband is obviously worried about his Mum and it would be difficult for you to change his thought process. We have a very supportive group here you may find it helpful to join, Family and Friends . There you will be able to share your thoughts and get advice and support from others in similar circumstances, and who understand. Click the link to get to the group and start a new discussion. Rather than typing out again, you may find it easier to copy and paste your above post in the group. I hope all goes well. Best wishes.

Best wishes to All,   rily.  What is a Community Champion ?