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How to cope with the diagnosis

Johndoe
Posted by

Hi, I'm new to the group. My partner has been dignoisied with bowel and liver cancer. The specialist has given him 4-6 months to live.

can I ask how do/are people dealing with this, we are both still in shock. He's still going to work, luckily he works for himself and not doing a lot. I'm at wo k, but my concentration is not good, but I know it's no good being at home. 

Thanks in advance for any help

latchbrook
Posted by

Hi  and a very warm welcome to the online community although I'm so sorry that you've had to find us.

It's perfectly natural for you and your partner to still be in shock after this diagnosis and hopefully you'll find plenty of support here.

There are various groups that I could suggest that you join to ask questions, share experiences and get support. To start with we have cancer specific groups like the bowel cancer group and liver cancer group. I will also add the secondary liver cancer group as I'm not sure from your post whether your partner's primary is bowel or liver. Those groups are all good for finding out specifics about the cancer and to ask other community members about their experiences.

The final group I'm going to suggest is the supporting someone with incurable cancer where you can freely discuss your emotions with others who will completely understand how you feel.

To join any or all of these groups just click on the links I've created and then choose 'Join This Group' on the page that opens. Once you've joined a group you can then post by clicking on 'Start A Discussion'.

You may also benefit from giving the Macmillan Support Line a call on 0808 808 0000. It's free to call, available from 9am to 8pm Monday to Friday and besides having experienced cancer nurses to answer your questions they also have a welfare rights team who could tell you what benefits you might be entitled to.

Sending supportive virtual (((hugs))) to both you and your partner

 "Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"

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DINAH MAY
Posted by

Hi

I can relate to your post so I thought I would drop you are quick line. My mother was diagnosed with incurable lung cancer and we had her with us for 4 months before she passed away. It will be 2 years at Christmas that she passed away, the only regret I have now is that I never really knew what to say or how to handle/cope with what was happening, I guess we are always used to looking after someone to make them well again but when you have a terminal diagnosis the shock really never goes away. Time is precious, spend as much time together as you can, talk about your feelings to each other and tell each other how much you love each other. Make this Christmas  a Christmas to remember, do anything and everything that you have always wanted to do together, and do it now. Each day is precious 

My love to you both XXX

Johndoe
Posted by

Thank you, we are doing just that, enjoying what time he has left. I plan on making lots of memories.  I lost my mum to lung cancer, it's something you never get over. Thank you again xxx

Bodach
Posted by

Hi

Sorry to hear your news and pleased that you have already received some very good support and advice so far and I wonder if reading this would be of any help to you

Coping when someone close to you has cancer

If you click on the green text above you can if you wish download the complete Macmillan booklet.

I hope it is of interest and help to you.

I hope that you are able to make many memories together in the next few months.

Ian 

 Ileostomy,Colostomy and Stoma Support Group

LIVING WITH A ST● MA

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Why not take a moment to complete your profile it really helps in answering your questions  How to update your PROFILE

You can always contact the Macmillan Support line on 0808 808 0000 Monday to Friday 9am to 8pm (not weekends or Bank Holidays) if you need to speak to someone in confidence. It's free from mobiles and landlines.