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Sadness and loneliness as a carer

Posted by

Hi all.  I am new to this and so here i go with my first post.  I am struggling with the depression and frustration that my dad is feeling with being ill.  I always remember his strength and therefore i find it hard to hear him so low. I feel sad, overwhelmed, lonely and a bit depressed.  I want to be strong for him and my mum but sometimes cant. Do others feel like this?  How do you deal with it?  X

Posted by


I think everybody knows that cancer is hard on the patient but a lot of people don't realise the toll it takes on the family and friends. Cancer is like a pebbled dropped in a pond - the patient's in the middle and the carers are in a ring nearby. The whole nasty mess ripples out far further than anybody expects.

I can't give you any useful advice - well I could dish some out but honestly, I don't think it would be very good and you'd spot that, I'm sure. BUT I can point you towards the 'Carers Only' group which is full of people sitting in that inner ring of devastation that surrounds the cancer patient. Over there you can say whatever want and I'm absolutely sure that you'll find people who understand exactly how you feel and what you're going through. So at risk of looking like I'm just playing pass the parcel, that's where you'll most likely find what you need.

If you also need advice relating to your dad's specific cancer type, we can help you there too. Just give us a wave and we'll hunt down the best groups for you.

I would send you a hug if I could but all I can send is a reassurance that you're not alone and that there are lots of people here who understand.

Posted by

Hi Barbara,

Thank you for your reply and i will look on the carers section. X

Posted by

Hi, please do come any join us in the carers section, though you are also welcome in almost all sections of the site.

Having been supporting my wife now for sometime I can attest as to how challenging things can be, you might also like to have a look through I'm Looking After Someone With Cancer

Well done for coming here, together we can defiantly be stronger.