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cancer diagnosis

Posted by

It has took me a while to access macmillan support as some days I am filled with anger, sadness and just despair at times. My husband was diagnosed with liver cancer in march 2017 out of the blue no symptoms, his only chance of survival then a liver transplant, sept that same year he was lucky to have a match and his recovery was amazing, after 18 month we were starting to get some normality back , even a first break away abroad. Then in March this year he started having severe back pain, it took several appt to finally get a scan and the news was devastating, cancer had returned, this time in bile duct, lymph nodes and lung. I keep asking myself why did it get this far when he gets bloods taken every month at the liver clinic and as a nurse I asked regularly about tumour markers , did i not ask or push enough , I am absolutly devastated and filled with blaming myself .My husband has started chemo and is on round 3 this continues to oct, what then I cannot even think .

Posted by

Hi  and welcome to the Online Community, although I am sorry to see you finding us and so sorry to hear about your husbands new diagnosis.

It's interesting that for me, my 20 year old journey with Lymphoma never once showed up in my many blood tests, so don't beat yourself up. You are into this with a vengeance and its all now about focusing on getting through.

"What then......?" yes been there a few times but I am amazed at what my teams have done over the years and I am still around.

My wife and I always found that talking with people who are on the same journey can help a lot. Can I highlight these links to our Bile duct cancer Lung, secondary cancer and Lymph nodes, secondary cancer Forums where you will connect with people who understand the journey your husband is on. You can ask the folks questions about tests, treatments and what to expect during the months ahead. 

Follow the link above and join the group by hitting the ‘Join the Group’ tab just under the main group name and it is worth indicating how you want to receive email notifications when someone answers your posts.

Go to the 'Start a Discussion' tab just under the main group name and set up your own Discussion and introduce yourself to the group - you could just copy an paste what you have in this first post. 

We do have these forums where you can connect with others supporting family and friends through their cancer journey: Carers Forum  and Friends and Family Forum.

You may find our various Macmillan Support Line Services to be helpful - call them on 0808 808 00 00 This free service covers Emotional Support, Practical Information. Clinical Information, Financial Support and Work Guidance mostly open 8.00 to 8.00 but check the link.

We also have our ‘Ask an Expert’. section where you can post questions to our mostly Volunteer Experts but please allow 2 working days to get a reply.

Our Online Information and Support Section  is a good place to find information covering cancer diagnosis, treatments and pages covering most types of cancers.

Talking to people face to face can help a lot so check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area or a Maggie’s Centre as these folks are amazing.

When you feel up to it try putting some information in your profile. This really helps others when answering. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. Just click on YOUR username, select 'Edit Profile'. Put as much or as little in your profile and you can amend it at any time - you can see members profiles by hitting our forum names.

All the very best.

Mike - Thehighlander

It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela