Supporting someone with incurable cancer

For carers, friends and families of people with a terminal diagnosis to discuss their emotions about the prospect of losing their loved ones, as well as practical issues about palliative care and end of life.

Terminal lung cancer

MOO50
Posted by

My husband has just had his 1st chemo treatment for terminal lung cancer now in his liver and lymph nodes. It takes over your life, its with you every minute. If I go out my husband is frightened of me not being there, but i have to work but only part time. I know its only going to get worse cancer isn't new to me. Its hard not to keep asking " are you ok".. and watching to make sure nothing else is wrong... not knowing how long we have together. Its cruel its cruel. 

How do I cope with this. 

MELMOO
lthenderson
Posted by

The honest answer on how to cope with this cruel disease is that you just do. I've been in your shoes and had those thoughts of not being able to cope with it but eventually I did. I tried to focus on just making this day the best as I can and not focus on the long term progression of the disease. I learned to ask others for help or when others offered, to accept it. Bringing us a simple meal so that we didn't have to spend time away from our loved one shopping for groceries and preparing it gave us countless hours of time together that we used to make lasting memories. 

My mother passed away 11 months ago and I'm still not sure how I coped. In ways, I'm still coping with her absence. 

MOO50
Posted by

I don't think  you ever get used to it, you just accept it and in your mind they are still there.  My mum is with me everyday.

MELMOO