Life after cancer

This group is for cancer survivors and people who have finished treatment. It is a space to discuss things like the physical and emotional after effects of cancer, returning to work, or trying to move on with your life.

Relationship with husband

Heather123456789
Posted by

My marriage was on the rocks before Cancer. My husband was lying about  where he was after work. He said he was at meetings often leaving me to run home stressed (1.5 hour journey on 3 trains)to cook for kids etc. He was a 20 minute drive away. Turned out he was at the pub. With cancer he came to all appointments. However after coming out of hospital (mastectomy and reconstruction) he did the same thing when I was laying at home alone. He still never cooked.He decided after a short time the cancer has been cut out so everything is normal. There was no let up and he never took care of me. I can’t forget it. I cannot love someone who emotionally abandoned me. I can forgive but his relationship with drink  is more important than me and continues to be. I have said to part twice but he has buried his head in the sand. After daughters exam next week I am going to really bring it home I want to part. Marriage is in sickness and in health. Anyone else had this.

buttercup01
Posted by

Hi Heather, u might want to read sdjmilk's post in this group?

There are some similarities to your situation.

Fear of the unknown is the worst thing. Once we know what we're facing, we find the strength to deal with it.
Galanthophile
Posted by

Having cancer makes us realise what’s important and also what we need to let go of so you’ve clearly come to a decision. You deserve a happy future so it sounds as though that will be on your own. It will be hard and stressful but you can’t go on like this. Wishing you the best of luck