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The summer was here but once a year, i laughed and explored such pleasures in dear. Then one day amidst my bloom, i looked at my curves in delude.I felt a spot, but not forgot, it would sing in my womanly sleep.
The joy i had known as accepting my woman, was to keep singing me to sleep. The spot grew and grew, and i could dream no more. What is this i implore.I try to leave my thoughts, but fight as i may, i know from within, it is not of the known.
I go to my docs, i try to think good, but the woman within keeps singing me to sleep. I am tested, i am poked, i m machined, i am coaxed, its a tumor i m told, there s no time to waste, it as to go you can t play host, but the woman within sings me to sleep.
I dream of my old self and yearn to stay, but a know i can party as host no more, it as to go. The days don t seem the same anymore, i repulse at the look of the increasing shriveled bump, and know the alien is in my womanly path, its me or it and it must go , and with it my womanly dreams and hopes and thoughts. What will i be when all this is over. I ll be me i thought, with turquoise eyes and inviting smile, and with hope alive.
But my alien wont get me, i will put up a fight, you wont beat me, be gone be gone, in the heart. I sleep now knowing, i did my best, but fate is forever, one big test. We gamble, we chance, in every avenue, i cut the cards and take the risks, outwitting, its like a game of charades. Sleep lady sleep your still you.
Written during Breast cancer by a survivor
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