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I'm in remission and to be honest I'm struggling. I was diagnosed with Rectal cancer back in March 2018. My treatment spread over 20 months. From Radiotherapy and Chemotherapy, 3 major stomach operations, and I recently had my ileostomy reversal November 2019.
When I had cancer my goal was to get back to work. Now I'm just a mess. I'm always tired, fatigued, my bowel hasn't completely settled and I'm on the toilet all day sometimes and still have accidents. I worry so much about getting back to work.
Occupational health have said I'm not ready for a month or two as my work have kept my position open for these past two years.
I'm terrified of going back to work. I'm not the same person I was before the cancer.
Sometimes I worry my work think I'm just 'milking' it or that they don't believe me.
I'm so confused. I had a lot of counselling during my cancer treatment but, I struggle to do the tools they gave me. I just want to put my head in the sand.
Has anyone else had the same experience after cancer?
Hi again Mbun so sorry to hear the struggles you are having.
First as Occupational Health is saying you are not ready for work then it is important that your employer/line manager knows this as it does make this clear where things are with your recovery.
The support needed during treatment is rather different to the support you need post treatments.
I am convinced that talking to people face to face who have been through treatment can help a lot so check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area or a Maggie’s Centre as these folks are amazing.
The fact that you have posted on this group is a small step in the right direction. I wish I had seen this great paper as it would have helped me identify the various milestones of the post treatment journey ((hugs))
Mike - Thehighlander
It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela
Thank you for your support and advice. I read the paper and I could relate to it.
I've been searching the links and see a Maggie's at Charing Cross.
I'm going to be seeking therapy through Occupational health, and I feel finding a support group would help a lot.
Great that you found the paper helpful. Maggie’s is worth giving a visit as the staff are amazing.
The more I talk with folks post treatment the more I am convinced that talking with folks who understand and who have walked the winding path helps you unpack the invisible rucksack of stuff that you have collected over this time. The rucksack needs to be emptied on the floor and few things thrown out.
There are a few discussion that are worth having a look through in the group so hit the discussions tab, make cup of tea/coffee and have a look.
Always around to listen and send ((hugs))
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