Emotional issues

Cancer can be emotionally draining, but sharing your feelings can help you and others in your situation. Talk about it here.

Bad dreams and not coping post hysterectomy

Gwills1972
Posted by

hi all, I was diagnosed with stage 1 grade 1 endometrial cancer on July 16th this year. 5 weeks later I had a vaginal hysterectomy ( I still have my ovaries) and have been given the all clear but will be checked every 6 months for 2 years. This is obviously brilliant and I’m so happy. But. I keep having bad dreams where I have different types of cancer and can’t get to a doctor. I have many many sleepless nights just lying in bed involuntarily thinking about it. I’ve tried lots of different methods like mindfulness apps and listening to soothing music but their affect is lessening.  And I feel a fraud because it was so ‘easy’ for me but I can’t help what I feel. And it’s effecting me. I don’t know how to get over this.  Am I alone in this?? 

Gwills1972
Stephy1
Posted by

Hello. First of all thanks for posting...your story is similar to mine. I had a hysterectomy in July for 1A endometrial cancer (kept ovaries) I felt like I had it easy too but I spoke to my cns today. She called me Superwoman and said I had actually been through so much. I am physically and emotionally drained. I too have dreams about my cancer and have gained new anxieties. Be kind to yourself. It’s been a rough journey. And our treatment wasn’t easy. I know how tough a hysterectomy is on the body...then there’s coping with work etc and the emotional side cannot be underestimated. Just know you’re certainly not alone. Everything you’re feeling is completely understandable and valid. 

Stephy1
Posted by

Hello. First of all thanks for posting...your story is similar to mine. I had a hysterectomy in July for 1A endometrial cancer (kept ovaries) I felt like I had it easy too but I spoke to my cns today. She called me Superwoman and said I had actually been through so much. I am physically and emotionally drained. I too have dreams about my cancer and have gained new anxieties. Be kind to yourself. It’s been a rough journey. And our treatment wasn’t easy. I know how tough a hysterectomy is on the body...then there’s coping with work etc and the emotional side cannot be underestimated. Just know you’re certainly not alone. Everything you’re feeling is completely understandable and valid. 

Thehighlander
Posted by

Hi  and welcome to the Community.

You are defiantly not alone in this and lots of folks go through various degrees of these challenges post treatments.

You are only 4-5 months post treatment so this is all still very real, raw and yes dreams and sleepless nights can be part of this.

I actually did ok after all my treatment but the main tool I found helped when I was having issues was talking with people one on one.

Talking to people face to face does help a lot so check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area or a Maggie’s Centre as these folks are amazing.

You may also want to have a look through this great paper as it does unpack some of the milestones in the post treatment journey.

((hugs))

Mike - Thehighlander

It always seems impossible until its done - Nelson Mandela

Gwills1972
Posted by

Thank you for your reply  it’s so reassuring I’m not alone

I've had to be so strong for everyone else I forgot to take time to just be ‘selfish’.  

Work have been amazing and I’m just finishing up a phased return to work but I’m so exhausted from not sleeping and I have a new boss I don’t really know yet so can’t speak to her as freely as the previous one. 

My family and friends have been wonderful too but it’s kind of like ‘you’re alright now what you going on about’ sometimes from some of them  so then I feel guilty for being upset      

I really don’t know what to with all these feelings. And I don’t want to bother Macmillan nurses or a dr because there are so many people going through so much more, I feel like a fraud.

 

Gwills1972
Gwills1972
Posted by

Hi Mike

thanks for responding. I’m going to go through the links you’ve posted tomorrow. I have a 4am alarm and I’m determined to sleep tonight!

Already the responses I’ve received are making me feel less alone.  I should have done this weeks ago. 

Have a good evening

Gwills1972
Stephy1
Posted by

You’re not a fraud. You’re a survivor and you have courage. Always talk to Macmillan...they’re amazing.