Emotional issues

Cancer can be emotionally draining, but sharing your feelings can help you and others in your situation. Talk about it here.

devastating diagnosis

razzy
Posted by

8 years ago I lost my husband to cancer, originally it was aesophigeagale cancer and after 41/2 years he had secondary bone cancer and after diagnosis lasted 6 months. I did not think that I would be using this site again. Monday 3 sept after mri on my back and ct on my chest I was informed I had cancer in my ribs, clavicle, sternum, and back. Don’t know where primary is yet. Apart from having a bad back for 8 months and been told it was sciatica. I have Been back and forwards to drs for pain, X-ray in May was clear.  Hospital physio sent me for mri. In June I felt pain in sternum and ribs was diagnosed with condrititus after X-ray. then even more pain in ribs end of August went back nurse practitioners sent me for a ct. lookout I had them on same day. I have had no symptoms. They think it is gynaecology problem. Waiting for scan. Jan 2018 I woke up and hemoridged went to gynaecologist who did biopsy’s which were negative and said it was probably due to start of menapause. Had no bleeding since. I’ve never missed a smear always negative. 

I have a range of emotions going on at the moment. The worst thing is how do I tell my daughters. I plan to do this on Wednesday when my youngest comes home from university for a couple of days. The older one knows something wrong as we work in the same place and after been told I went back to work obviously very upset and colleagues asked her if I was ok. I told her I was having tests and should know in couple of days what they were going to do about the pain I’m in.

second thing is did the drs miss something on xrays and biopsies. I begged my dr for scan on back in May even offered to pay and was told X-ray would show anything up. I can’t stand up straight due to pain and can’t walk far as getting breathless which I kept telling the drs.

sorry to rant and about the spelling mistakes.

Joanne

buttercup01
Posted by

Hi razzy,

I'm so sorry you've been going through this long drawn out process to get a diagnosis. It sounds like a catalogue of incompetence, small wonder u want to rant!.

Could u update your profile a bit  so ppl know your current situation? It'll save u having to repeat yourself later.

Do you have any other family apart from your daughters? If so, try n make sure they're around when u tell them your health news.

Keep in touch n let us know how it goes on Wed

Fear of the unknown is the worst thing. Once we know what we're facing, we find the strength to deal with it.
buttercup01
Posted by

Hi razzy, how did it go l on Wed n with telling your daughters?

We are here to help n support you. Don't be alone xx

Fear of the unknown is the worst thing. Once we know what we're facing, we find the strength to deal with it.
razzy
Posted by

Hi buttercup

sorry not replied sooner I did not get any notifications It went fine we cried together. Told them I was going to fight it with everything I had. We then laughed l, hugged. Youngest said she knew something wrong. Few days later we went away for a few days, not too far incase there was more test to be had. I had to go for a MAmmagram even though I had one 6 months prior which was negative. This mamagram came back clear but they decided to do a biopsy of the nipple which showed up lobula cancer and they would try to slow its growth. So at last I had a diagnosis not one any of us expected not even my GP.  Apparently this cancer does not always show up on mammogram.

i have to see an oncologist on Monday to see what treatment I can have and a palliative care nurse on Tuesday.

My youngest has gone back to university she’s training to be a nurse she is very strong and has took the news fine. My eldest was fine at first, too fine so I sat her down Thursday and explained that the cancer was not curable but treatable in that they will try to stop or slow it’s growth. She totally broke down as she had not realised. After we both had a good cry together. I am going to arrange for her to go to a councillor, she is fine with that. 

So Monday is when I find out what treatment plan they have in store for me. Since Thursday I have been on a rollercoaster with my emotions. 

Thank you for the support xxx

Joanne

Kazdan
Posted by

That must be so tough x our thoughts and good wishes go out to you x we haven’t even got a treatment plan yet but already been upset just by a diagnosis of prostate cancer x

Kazdan
razzy
Posted by

Hi Kazdan

I know how upset you must be feeling. I'm hoping once my treatment plan is in place and I know what I am facing I will be ok it's the not knowing. Hope you have a treatment plan in place you might feel better. Mine is advanced having found the mets before primary so only treatable not curable yours has probably been found early and there are lots of things they can do. Try to be positive.

kind regards

Joanne

buttercup01
Posted by

Good luck razzy for Mon re treatment plan.

Btw, many of us on this site have treatable but not curable cancer. There are many drugs now available to keep cancer at bay, ie slow its growth down. There are more being developed all the time, certainly for  Kidney cancer , which  I have been living with for 14' years. 

Fear of the unknown is the worst thing. Once we know what we're facing, we find the strength to deal with it.
buttercup01
Posted by

Hi Kazdan,

Good luck to u too re treatment plan. When's your oncology appointment?

Fear of the unknown is the worst thing. Once we know what we're facing, we find the strength to deal with it.
Kazdan
Posted by

I am awaiting a call from the hospital to confirm when they want to see me to discuss my treatment plan.  It’s all the waiting I hate.

Kazdan
buttercup01
Posted by

Yes, Iagree - waiting really is the pits.Hope u don't have to wait too long x

Fear of the unknown is the worst thing. Once we know what we're facing, we find the strength to deal with it.
Kazdan
Posted by

Hoping to hear something this week.

Kazdan