Breast cancer for the under-50s

Breast cancer is far less common in the under-50s, but this can leave younger people with a diagnosis feeling isolated. This group is a place for them to come together, share experiences and support each other.

My partner doesn't want to talk about my diagnosis

Posted by

My partner is currently working away. We haven't seen each other since my diagnosis. He has  changed totally in the way he speaks to me on the phone . Right now I feel like he is a stranger instead of my partner  of 10 years. I attempted to explain to him how this makes me feel but nothing has changed. I am now dreading him coming home. 

Any ideas how I can get him to open up about how he feels? Thank you in advance 

Posted by

sandra _2306

He's probably in shock and worried, especially if this has come out of the blue. Can you write him a letter/ email calmly saying how you feel or point him to the Macmillan site to get some info. He'll open up when he's ready so don't push him. But keep talking and give him time. He might find it easier to email his thoughts to you as he might not want to vocalise them. Can any other family members talk with him?

Hope you've got lots of other support. 

Posted by

Hi Sandra, 

Firstly so sorry you find yourself here but you are definitely in the right place. 

My husband was working away when I was diagnosed, luckily he was able to get home the next day. He didn’t take it well at all, however we did talk. 
I appreciate it’s difficult for partners but they aren’t the ones going through this in the same way we do. He should be totally supporting you. 
Who is there for you right now?

Macmillan do have some good booklets on talking about cancer. Perhaps get an appointment at the hospital and both go together or a McMillan unit if you have one near you.

This is awful for you, someone is always here so we can try and help and support you if we can. 
pls let us know how you are getting on.

Hugs Tina x