Vickyp0106's blog

Mum passed away

2009-12-10T18:09:01Z

We lost our dear mum in the early hours of this morning. Almost 12 months after being diagnosed. She had all of her family round her and she eventually slipped away. I know she is with the angels now and that is some comfort at this time. This site has been a great source of support for me.

Take care everyonexxx

The day we've all been dreading

2009-11-13T19:59:14Z

Last tuesday we were told that mums tumors have not reduced in size and that they want to stop all treatment as nothing is working. We're all devastated as all they can do now is manage the symptoms as and when they appear. This is the news that we've all been dreading. Mum has always been focusing on the treatment never thinking about it not being available. She feels abandoned now as if all she can do is wait. We've said she needs to live her life as much as she can now. It's such a difficult time for everyone. Her pain relief isn't right yet, trial and error for the time being. More morphine is needed. She's taking so many pills. I wish i had some good news but there isn't. She was diagnosed with sclc in dec last year and has been on chemo for 11 months. We went to visit the hospice week which i wasn't keen on but actually it was ok. It's a nice place as you would expect and now we have seen it, it wont be so scary when we finally do need to go there. Mum kept saying she's not ready for this. So sad to hear she's only 52. It's not fair, life isn't fair.

So sad

2009-09-21T19:29:59Z

Mum has been on a trial since june. The first scan showed the tumor in her neck hadn't grown and may have reduced slightly. 6 weeks on and the scan has shown that 2 other tumors have appeared and now they have taken her off the clinical trial and she is due to start standard chemo tomorrow. I think this is the last thing that they can try for her. She is due to be scanned again in 6 weeks and if the chemo hasn't done anything then i don't know if i can bear it. She's been talking to me about arrangements and priests and hospices and i can't believe this is happening. She looks well and feels ok yet i know the cancer is spreading and that there may not be much time left. I'm not sure if i have the strength to face whats approaching and life afterwards without mum. Why is this happening to us?

No good news

2009-09-21T19:25:03Z

Hi there
My mum has small cell lung cancer and was diagnosed in dec 08. They treated her with chemo and radio and managed to clear the lung of the tumour. But after stopping chemo in april another tumour appeared in her neck in june. She's now back on chemo ( a clinical trial) and they have given her months as opposed to years. I too am devastated. She's 52 and i'm 33 my youngest sister is 20. Mum doesn't want to know 'how long' I asked the doc when mum was out of the room as they kept referring to quality of life and time you have left. I wish i didn't know as now all i can do is imagine life without her and how awful it will be. It's so unfair. She's to be scanned in a fortnight but it'll make no difference really as now they can only try to prolong her life with chemo if her body tolerates it. I'm scared of what the next 6/12 months will bring as i don't want to watch her decline.I'm now trying to make every moment count and listen to her and take pictures of her with my baby (he's 6 months old) and keep strong in front of her even though inside im screaming.

Life is cruel.