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2009-11-08T10:15:33Z

many thanks for the kind words .i know im not as strong as joy but will get through as best as poss .the support here is very welcome-i can say stuff here that i wouldnt to family or friends .

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2009-11-07T06:55:56Z

ive just read through yesterdays epic --i didnt say what a lovely lady she was .the best mum,nanny.friend & my wife for 37 years & im missing her so much

the story so far

2009-11-06T16:23:32Z

ive finally felt like telling whats been happening --in truth its mainly for my benefit to go over events .it certainly isnt date perfect but as best as i can manage .

17 oct 2001 (worst day of my life ) joy was diagnosed with breast cancer--she had a mastectomy within 2 weeks.the surgeon was pleased with himself & said no further treatment was necessary .

jan 02--we had a bril holiday in the maldives .when we got home we were told that joy should have had chemo & the oncol could not understand why it hadnt started .chemo was started & joy had all the normal side effects but got through the 3 month treatment .

dec 02-our eldest daughter married &joy was thrilled .

2003-joys hair grew back & life returned to normal(ish )

dec03--first grandson borne & life was pretty good .

jan05--joy had been suffering with various pains & had a scan which showed that the c had spread to her bones .within a week she she had a pin put in her leg & had R/T .her father died in jan & i can picture joy walking down the aisle on crutches .

05--again joy got over this hiccup & was positive & got on as normal .our youngest daughter married in the summer & life was good again .there were obviously some bad days but she didnt let herslf get too down .

july 06--the c spread again-this time to her organs .a new course of chemo was started by infusion .after a few treatments the sideeffects reduced ,hair had gone but not too much sickness .within a few weeks joy was back to her old self .

nov 06--second grandson appears .

apr07--during a holiday in spain with her sister joy suffered dizzy spells & headaches.on return to the uk she had a scan where a benign tumour was found .we were advised that no further action was needed .

dec07--the headaches had restarted & she had a further scan .a tumour was confirmed & an operation was necessary .

19 dec07-(second worst day of my life )-joy went into addenbrookes & had the operation-successfully by all accounts .3 hours later (just as i arrived to see her )she had a haemorrhage .she was taken back to theatre & i was ushered into a room &advised to get my daughters there asap .she was not expected to survive but she did .i was told that the chance of a haemorrhage were minute --friends & family couldnt believe it after all she had already been through .however she was left with stroke like symptoms& was in various hospitals for 10 weeks .

feb 08--joy came home-we had been kitted out with medical bed ,chairs ,frames etc .we also had help during the day .joys speech& mobility improved amazingly & for the rest of the year we had some good times.she had set herself targets & was achieving them .

dec 08--joy had not been strong enough for treatment & the c spread again .the oncol started a course of treatment but the side effects were dreadful & treatment had to stop .

feb 09--our youngest daughter produced a grandson .this was joys last target--she wouldnt make anymore .

4 april--joy lost her battle(but she gave it a bloody good go ).

4 june--i was diagnosed with locally advanced prostate cancer.

the girls are coping now--least i think they are .

streuth-ive been waffling for which i apologise but i feel better for it(me me me ).

shannock

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the story so far