a glimmer of hope

just to warn you that this isn't a joke if your looking for laughs look away. but its not all doom and gloom either . i had a really good appointment at the marsden , far far better than i had hoped for .my ct and pet scans both show that the tumour is localised ..phew! professor gore was very positive , he doesn't think chemo is a good first option this time as it didn't work before ..and if it gets any bigger and spreads anymore then thats it there no controlling it . he says that if they get this right then they can get the cancer under control. and even the magical word cure was mentioned ...but personally i think this is his favourite word . it nice though just to see this glimmer of hope , thats all i needed. his plan , if he can ok it with the surgeons , is to do surgury first followed by radiotherapy and maybe chemo last. which is what i wanted i was never a fan of the chemo first option . my local hospital poo poohed doing any surgury for fear of spread , but the marsden seemed to think the same as me that by doing any chemo there maybe a chance it doesn't do anything . so he thinks by doing surgury that it gives me a chance dispite the risks. and it looks like i'll get the marsden's surgeon's too , well i can't get better than that. so i'm off on holiday now until Friday . then i'm back to the marsden to meet up with the surgeon's..thank you so so much to everyone for the messages over the past few weeks and i'm just very sorry for all the fur oar yesterday , jill wrote me a lovely p.m and i hope it can all be put aside so that we can get on with listening and being here to support each other.