numb slow motionhttps://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-blogs/b/numb_slow_motion/atomTelligent Community (Build: 12.1.2.21912)2011-06-21T11:31:53Zmy boyshttps://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-blogs/b/numb_slow_motion/posts/my-boys2011-06-21T12:06:45Z2011-06-21T12:06:45Z<p>my husband and son i love them so much. i have a mamogram and biopsy tomorow im realy scared not for me for my 2 beautiful guys they are everything to me.last night i had a nightmare that he said he didnt love me because of bc. in my sleep i felt so scared so angry then he came home from night shift he woke me and our son with a kiss i was so glad to see him i forget what he has done and does for me and our baby. wish he knew how gratefull i am and how proud i am to be his wife to have his love.</p>
<p>i love you both uncoditionaly and eternaly <3andy+corb<3 my amazing boys</p><div style="clear:both;"></div><img src="https://community.macmillan.org.uk/aggbug?PostID=432927&AppID=31956&AppType=Weblog&ContentType=0" width="1" height="1">Former Memberhttps://community.macmillan.org.uk/members/formermemberso numb so slow so stillhttps://community.macmillan.org.uk/cancer-blogs/b/numb_slow_motion/posts/so-numb-so-slow-so-still2011-06-21T10:31:53Z2011-06-21T10:31:53Z<pre>hi my names ema yup one m,,,,, i like being different.</pre>
<address>i have a son he is 1 and a husband</address><address>last year in july i nearly died my kidnys got s infected i just pulled through and no more my husband is the best he doesnt really show his feelings but now and again i see sorrow and fear in his eyes when my kidney thing is mentioned at the begining of the month found a lump in my left breast i never realy check and i dont know why i checked that morning i just DID just instict i guess.</address><address>i went into the bedroom and told my husband he justgot this look on his face not disbelief not sorrow just his eyes saying "not again" it was more than fear... i asked him to tell me it was nothing that i would be ok that it was just a cyst.</address><address>he just looked at his hands lookd at our son and it felt like a century till his eyes came to me and he just said he couldnt tell me that he told me to get checked i went to the doctors and she said the lump is to deep to tell so i need to go to the clinic.... she said the lump felt harder than a cyst but she couldnt comment yet.</address><address> </address><address> well tomorow is breast clinic day- stobhill 9:35 am.. i have no idea how to get there i dont know what to expect when i do get there.</address><address>it sounds stupid but if it is cancer i justdont have time for it its not losing my hair ect it just i have a son i'm a model i cant b ill.</address><address>i know you are all going through worse.. alot worse. but at some point you were me so please just tell me what to expectat my apt....</address><div style="clear:both;"></div><img src="https://community.macmillan.org.uk/aggbug?PostID=432895&AppID=31956&AppType=Weblog&ContentType=0" width="1" height="1">Former Memberhttps://community.macmillan.org.uk/members/formermember