Another Day

Perspective

2011-01-01T22:05:44Z

Massively pissed off right now. How does everyone else deal with people, and by people I mean close family members, who just don't seem to get what you are going through?

These last 2 months have been the most stressful and worrying of my life. My brother and his girlfriend came down to stay with me. I've spent most of my life dealing with depression and even though my brother was there through it all, he still never quiet understood. The last thing I need right now is more drama in my life, and he seems to thrive on it. Started slamming doors and screaming at me over the fact that I hadn't sorted out the broken phone socket in the spare room. Had to remind him I'd had other things on my mind lately.

He then went into the guest room and explained to his girlfriend that she couldn't make her phone call because I have cancer. I have never been so angry in my life.

Is it just me or is he the most unbelievably selfish person?

Phone Calls

2010-12-09T21:05:27Z

Had a good I think. Mainly just phone calls from hospitals, but good to keep the ball rolling.

Have been told that they've ordered a PET scan for me, so it's just a matter of a 2 week wait. I have a CT scan planned for Wednesday next week. Have no idea how much that will change my life. Hrmm...

The surgeon who removed my swollen lymph node called me today. That was nice. She was very reassuring and told me not to read the doom and gloom on the medical sites regarding stages and stats.

I'll also be having a block dissection after my PET scan, to remove the buggers.

May just go and watch a Christmassy movie now and rewrite my Christmas list.

Come Undone

2010-12-09T11:23:00Z

I'm about 48 hours into my Cancer experience. I was told on the 7 December 2010 that the lymph node they removed was a melanoma. I had suspected I had Lymphoma but now I'm not sure which is worse.

It's heart stopping and devastating at first. But yesterday I saw the Dermatologist who seemed reassuring. 2 new holes in my body. They took the least perfect looking moles to send to the lab, even though they didn't appear to be suspect under close examination. They conference call with Southampton General has resulted in them ordering a PET scan for me in Guildford and after that it's more surgery to remove other affected nodes.

Waiting is just as hard as not knowing.