Chemo began in February 2014
Ray was so very courageous and strong, always believing he would beat the cancer and get well again.
He tolerated all the chemo playing golf two or three times every week but his weight continued to drop and he looked so sad and vulnerable. His golf partners were amazed that he was still able to play 18 holes but it did take its toll when he came home in the evening, often too tired to eat anything and feeling sick.
my sadness was so severe I found myself crying all the time and with a constant pain in my chest, he struggled to eat at times and on some occasions would get food stuck and be sick all night long until he was totally exhausted. I lost any interest in food myself and often could not eat unless I took my food somewhere else.
As I write this the tears are flowing, somehow I had to let all this sadness out. Being a carer for the one you love is the hardest thing in the whole world. The sense of helplessness and despair is so strong it takes over every waking moment and no one can understand unless they have experienced it.
I tried to be strong because he was so strong but it was so hard. My family were amazing but they could not see how I'll he was (or did not want to). He worried so much about me.
The chemo shrunk the tumour and June and July 2014 were fairly peaceful. He played Golf and looked almost normal. My lifeline was the Community and the mutual support and encouragement we gave to one another.
