Well I can't believe it's been over 3 weeks. Mum's house, my childhood home, is virtually empty of her things now. It was her funeral 2 days ago. It went well, just what she would have wanted. I didn't wear black, I warned her I wasnt going to, in fact I warned everyone. So glad to see others not wearing black either. We decided on a cremation, and at some point will be having her ashes buried with Dad, at his grave. We entered the Crem to Elvis, 'The Wonder of You', she loved Elvis. I managed to do a eulogy, felt so proud of myself. Bill Haleys 'Rock Around The Clock' was the final piece of music, one that she and dad would dance to. Mum had made everything easy for us, although she hadn't got a funeral plan or had made a will, she left everything in order so has been very straightforward. I'm still waiting for the overwhelming grief, whilst I feel very sad, I don't think it's arrived yet. I'm not throwing myself into being busy, but just not feeling it yet. Not like when we lost dad, I was numb for weeks. I wonder if subconsciously I've been expecting this for so long, or is it just that it hasn't hit me yet. One thing is for certain, I feel like I am constantly clocking things that I would normally have chatted to mum about. I always rang her about 7pm, I'm missing not calling her. Think this is where it's going to get me the most. I just want to ring her for a chat.
