Bit scared, and not sure it has fully sunk in?

Cervical cancer

For people affected by cancer of the cervix to get together, ask questions, share experiences and support each other

Bit scared, and not sure it has fully sunk in?

No. of entries: 5 | Posted on 27 Jan 2013 11:20
  • Hi all, I have been reading your posts for a few days and now feel I should try put something on here. 27th nov 2012 went for pre coil appointment, had a smear too as was slightly overdue, dr noticed some bleeding but said shd b ok. Had letter from hospital 7 dec to hv colposcopy on 17 December due to severe d word sorry I can't spell it... The consultant made sure I had loop incision whilst there. Because of Xmas etc had to wait for results before thinking of coil being put back in. Waited till 16 jan and then spoke to my dr who knew nothing until I had said, he looked p records of hosp whilst talking, said there was a letter where they had to discuss my results, which sounded daunting... He did some chasing and apparently that letter had only been sent that day, anyhow finally got a phone call from the consultants secretary, which I missed and called back 10 mins later she had left already. Tried to call back the next day found she had totally left her job and not left any message... Eventually another secretary got through to consultant who said I needed to come in that Wednesday, which I did to find she was off sick... The lady there was the lady at the colposcopy with the consultant but she didn't know if they had had the meeting or not. The only thing she could tell me was that the results had shown the abnormality was deeper than thought, and she reckoned would mean another loop or hysterectomy... Which was slightly a shock, she told me she would call me if they had had the meeting and they would try make another meeting for the week later. She did call me about 5ish to tell me they had had the meeting and they needed me to come in for an MRI as soon as possible she was doing paperwork as we were speaking... I said this sounded serious... And asked are we talking cancer now? She said yes we were!...... My mind is all over the place at the moment, I'm not sure what to do, my lovely partner says I'm tossing and turning in my sleep at mo, and I haven't said anything to my son just yet.... I had a lady call on Friday who had organised the follow on meeting for the Wednesday... Explained all of the above and she called me back later... Apparently I don't need that meeting, I need to talk to the consultant to talk about my options, and they are hoping she will be back this week... Till then I'm just waiting.... I have discussed with my partner and we are both ok with hysterectomy.. I'm 41, he will be 50 in few weeks time, I think I'm just in shock with the speed of everything... One minute this next that and then the big c word! I haven't really cried yet and as I have said haven't said anything to my soon to be 15 year old son....sorry for all this long rant, any positive words would be appreciated... Thanking you in advance
    Harm none, do as ye will!
  • Hun, I am so sorry about your situation. Keep the faith and what you are feeling is so normal (unfortunately)!  You will be amazed at what you can actually handle when and as it comes...your strength is amazing inside and I think most of it comes from being a mother..

  • Hi Hun x sorry to hear what's happened - it's an awful situation to be in made worse when you have to wait for results and doctors to get back to you - I've been in that situation many times all I can say is stay strong talk to your husband - he sounds supportive - and your family & friends. I hope you get your meeting soon and get everything sorted xx You will need support and I havent been on this site for long but it's so helpful to talk to other people who know exactly how you are feeling x I have two kids 19 & 13 now and told them once I knew what exactly was going on which was about six months after I was diagnosed and knew it hadn't spread - they were great about it I was expecting tears especially of my daughter - the youngest - she was only 11 at the time but she was really interested asking loads of questions - she loves gruesome things & wants to be a vet or a midwife !!! Kids can cope better than you think and I'm sure your son will be a support to you xx I was diagnosed in 2010 after having a large lump removed from my abdomen the size of a watermelon had been told for a year it was a kidney cyst but when they removed & examined it they found cancerous cells in it I went for what I thought was a routine follow up to my op on my own only to be told they had found cancer cells but not to worry and I'd be referred to gynacaelogy so I thought well it's not cancer it's just cancer cells ?? Think i was in denial as i was a health care assistant for 16 years and cared for elderly people with cancer that couldnt be me ??? Even when I got my appointment through it was for oncology and I thought they're playing it safe going over the top because the growth I had was extremely rare so I went on my own again !! Bad idea it was cancer and was booked in for loads of scans etc to see if it had spread it hadn't luckily so I didn't need any treatment !! as they couldn't Identify where the cells had come from - either my bowel or ovary they decided to class me as having stage 1a gastro intestinal cancer - I've just had a bad year with bowel problems so loads of tests and an op in jan to remove polyps from my bowel but I'm still in remission halfway to the all clear Just try & stay strong and keep positive xx wish you all the best xx
    Missy
  • Hi Sarah,  oh the waiting is absolute hell but once you know what you are facing I think you will feel better as you then have a focus and goals.  I know I felt much better once I knew what I was dealing with.  In my case is was stage 2b cancer which was identified from the MRI and then a treatment plan was put together with dates and times which really focused my mind and helped me get orgnised. You will get through this and there is plenty of support and information on this forum whatever the outcome.  Nobody can stop you worrying right now but stay positive and strong and you will come through this. Hopefully you will know what the situation is very soon.   Sending you lots of positivity and warm wishes.  Feel free to contact me if you want any specific info or just feel like a rant....we all know how you feel right now.....best wishes Andrea

  • Thank you all for your comments and positive thoughts. My consultant called me at home today, she apologised for not being there last Wednesday, wanted to check I was ok, and to let me know my options. She was not happy I had not had the appointment for the MRI scan, and by midday I had a call from them with appointment for this Wednesday at 11. This means they will have their meeting the next Tuesday and I guess I get a clearer picture of time frames, I'm guessing the date for hysterectomy will be shortly after? I'm going to let my son have his birthday tomorrow, before I start letting him know what's happening with me.... Anyhow thank you all again your all very kind x
    Harm none, do as ye will!
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