Hi brave people, my name is Jo and my daughter has recently been diagnosed with cervical cancer, she had an abnormal smear, then some taken away, which showed cancer, her MRI scan showed a 3cm masbut said it cant detect small clusters under 5ml. shes having to have a hysterectomy, but they are hoping to save an ovary and move it under her arm, I really cannot grasp all this that is happening to my baby girl, shes so strong and brave and is devoted to fundraising to help , but Im selfish and scared and dont understand at ll, she doesnt like dwelling on it she says and is living life to the full, she goes for pre op 25th April, day before her 25th bithday and May 2nd the hysterectomy, I dont want to sound selfish and pathetic but can anyone talk to me about this and how best to look after her, shes my life x 

Hi Joanne, welcome to the site, you will find lots of suport on here, lots of lovely people, if you say a little bit on your profile I think it helps get a reply, hope someones around, I don't know this one, x Kev

hi jo , sorry to hear about your daughter  . .  i too was diagnosed at 24 year old , im 26 now and in remission ,my cervical cancer was quite similar to your daughters  .  they found abnormal cells , got diagnosed with cervical cancer and i had a 3-4cm mass too , so hysterectomy was the only option for me too , i got a radical hysterectomy on the 1st of april 2010 they managed to save my ovarys. i understand how your daughter must be feeling right now  . . sounds like you and your daughter are very close , as is myself and my mum , and i know me personally i wanted to try and keep strong for my mum because i knew how much it was tearing her apart watching me go through it all .one thing i wanted was for everyone to treat me normal , as i just felt as though i was a cancer victim  , i tried to stay strong through the whole process from getting diagnosed to all the hospital appointments then to my hysterectomy all the time just thinking i need to get this cancer out my body , it was after the hysterectomy that all my emotions hit me , shock that it had happened to me , un answered questions going around in my head and of course loosing my fertility at 24 years of age was the worst of all ! to me that has been far worse (coping with life after a hysterectomy ) and thats when i really needed my mum the most .your not sounding selfish , not one bit , it must be just as hard for you watching your daughter going through this , just as hard is it is for your daughter to be going through it  .. i think as long as your there for her to talk to she will be fine , thats all you can do , theres going to be good and bad days , its like a world wind and  before you know it , its all over and done with,all you can do is be there every step of the way with your daughter  . . if shes anything like i was , it will be after her op she will need you the most ! i felt an overwhelming strength to get through it and stay strong before my op , but after it all hit home for me  . . i hope this helps a little bit and i wish you and your daughter all the best 
                        from lisa x

Hi Jo, I'm really sorry to  hear about your daughter's news. I am 36 and last December I was diagnosed with cervical cancer. My mass was around 4cm and on 19 March this year I had a radical hysterectomy including removal of my pelvic lymph nodes. My ovaries were retained and also moved like your daughter's will be. I have been out of hospital for 4 weeks now and I am recovering well, albeit very slowly! Biopsies of everything they removed were taken following my op and I received a call 2 weeks ago from my Oncologist to confirm that all of the cancer had been removed and my lymph nodes are clear. It sounds as though your daughter's cancer has been caught at a very similar stage to mine and the earlier it is caught the better as it limits the chance of the cancer having spread outside of the cervix. Having said all of this and trying to be positive, the emotional effects of having cancer are huge and at times overwhelming. I was the same as your daughter in saying that I wasn't dwelling on it etc as I have a 10 year old son and I am also a single mum so that was more than enough to recover for! It wasn't until after the op that my emotions hit me in terms of what I had been through and also losing my fertility. I am very fortunate that I have my son, but I met a new partner last summer and we planned on having more children. It is hard coming to terms with all of that and the thought that perhaps your right to have children has been taken away from you. I am feeling much more positive now that I am recovering though. In terms of what you can do as a Mum, I would say just be there for her as much as possible and be guided by how she is feeling. My parents are in their late 70s and haven't coped very well so I feel I have lacked that support. It is really important to have your Mum around and just that fact alone is one of the most reassuring. Don't forget that this will affect you too and there is lots of support for you too. I really hope all goes well on 2nd May. As for feeling selfish and pathetic, you are not at all. Just a caring Mum! xx

Your journey has so touched me, and so glad you have taken the time to respond to me, my daughter is so involved in fundraising I think it wont hit her, the only thing she said was when she told me how beautiful hers and her patrners grandchildren were going to be for me, I am with her in constant touch and Im sure she knows nothing, well not as much, of how Im crumbling, you have given me hope I darent even write my true fears as I think its tempting fate, but yours sounds so similar I am optimistic for the possibly first time, thankyou so much for this Im going to sit and read and rad this, it has given me hope for her future, thanks for your support, roll on May 2nd then a two week wait, but will cross that bridge then, thankyou Jo xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

..Your journey has so touched me, and so glad you have taken the time to respond to me, my daughter is so involved in fundraising I think it wont hit her, the only thing she said was when she told me how beautiful hers and her patrners grandchildren were going to be for me, I am with her in constant touch and Im sure she knows nothing, well not as much, of how Im crumbling, you have given me hope I darent even write my true fears as I think its tempting fate, but yours sounds so similar I am optimistic for the possibly first time, thankyou so much for this Im going to sit and read and rad this, it has given me hope for her future, thanks for your support, roll on May 2nd then a two week wait, but will cross that bridge then, thankyou Jo xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx