Hi

New here don.t really know where to turn at the moment. My husband was diagnosed with bgm 4 in july 10. He had debulkin then 6 weeks RT and chemo has just finished further 6 Mths Chemo and has scan next week. We have 3 children aged 20 15 and 13. My husband is 52. He seems very well at the moment but although he is lovely with every one else, he is pretty awful to us, Is this normal??

Den,

Im so sorry to hear the you and your husband have had to join our ranks.  I myself embarked on this journey back in May last year and am fast approaching my first years anniversary with GBM4.  (See my profile)

I think I was much the same when first given the diagnosis and took out my anger on my loved ones.  I remember thinking Why me but this soon passed my wife and children and have been and always will be my rock and I'm sure that your husband will feel the same about you.

Everyones journey is different and we all cope in different ways.  You will read a lot of positive and negaitave stuff on here but please dont dwell on the negaitave for too long.  You will get lots of help here I know I have.  Most of us talk in We Talk Brain Tumours.

I don't tend to post too often I prefer to read  My journey so far has been a good one and infact was given the All Clear from Tumour and Cancer In december but this is subject to change at any time I'm scanned every 6 months.

Sometimes life deals you blows that knock you to your knees.  But no matter what happens, we all have to get up and move forward.  Life goes on.

Kind regards

Mr T

Thankyou so much I hope he changes but sometimes I don,t think he realises what our children are going through.

I hope you stay well

Kind regards Denise

hi i know exactly how u r feeling we r at the same stage as u, husband diagnosed with GMB4 feb, had de-bulking op & finished 6wk chemo & radiotherapy lst week, i also have 2 children 16 & 13, although we have'nt told them that the tumour is not curable yet, as my oldest son is just sitting exams at school & as u say since diagosis my husband & son can barely b in the same room with each other or spek & have a civil conversation i know they are both angry with life at the moment, but i think from talking 2 others at the hospital that this is fairly normal, as they say u always hurt the one's u love!

Helo den

    I'm a little bit like you at the moment the feeling of not being in control of life anymore  is not nice.  My partner is 43 had the brain tumour removed on the 19th April and all along we were told it was benign.  Sadly when they did the tests after the opp part of it was malignant.

He starts  6 weeks of radio and chemo at the end of the month and then has 6 months of chemo.  Our boys are 24 and 19, I think the hardest part was telling them but you will be surprised at how strong they are.

    I am getting the same,  ok with everybody else but with me he is short etc I just have to let it go although sometimes I have to really bite my tongue :(  I think he like your hubby must be angy and terrified of whats the future going to hold  all rolled in to one so it must be very very hard.  But we love them and I just  ignore his ranting and let it go over my head because I know thats not the the norm from him.

I hope the  treatment goes well for him and kep your chin up

chrissi x

Hi Jayne

The one thing i've learnt by posting on here is that we are not alone. My husband has just had his scan and we get the results on the 6th June. I,m sure it will be good news for now, ( fingers crossed ) and then I think that he will be much more positive

We decided to tell our children from the beginning what the situation was and they are coping very well. It's hard to take when my husband is actually very well after all his treatment. I hope everything goes well for you and all your family. Stay strong I am trying to.

I have  avery wise friend who gave me some advise, that when I am feeling very stressed to go out for a drive in my car and scream as loud as I can. I tried this one day and felt pretty stupid and never got as far as the scream, but it made me laugh so much that it cheered me up. I have since managed the scream and boy it works for me.

Much Love Denise

Hi Chrissi

I,m sure your right. I hope that the chemo and RT for your husand go as well as they did for mine. He was a little bit tired but thats all really. He lost a bit of hair bit now it's all grown back, and would you believe it. he has no grey in it.  He did have another massive seizure about a month after the RT but that was because he decided to stop taking his steroids.( He was going through a very stroppy period then ) He has not had any more since and at present is not taking any meds but awaiting his scan result on 6th June. (fingers crossed)

Stay strong and lots of luck with everything

Much Love Denise

Hi,

My mum was exactly the same, particularly with my Dad, so I would say that it is normal and apparrently depending on where the tumor is it can affect your emotions and control of them.

Like normal if there is something wrong, it is normally the people closst that are most affected..

Sorry to hear your news, my mum was diagnoses Feb last year and is very poorly at the moment.

Stay positive and take care..

Yvonne