Re: how do I get over the loss of my husband?

Coping with loss

Losing a loved one is one of the most painful experiences we ever have to go through. If you feel ready to talk about how you’re feeling, there are people here who understand and are ready to listen and support you.

how do I get over the loss of my husband?

No. of entries: 434 | No.of favourites: 1 | Posted on 19 Oct 2009 10:11
  • I lost my beautiful wife Nic 10 days ago to breast cancer secondary bone cancer.I have 2 kids 1 of which was born whilst she was receiving treatment,ive got to bury the love of my life tommorrow.Ikeep crying cant get up in the morning and feel that no 1 understands I feel compleately alone even though ive got the two kids and family around.I just cant function properly and am missing her so much.Sorry to put this out there,but i feel that only someone whos been through this experience would understand.

    thanks dave

  • Sorry to hear you`ve lost your wife xxx

    Will be thinking of you tomorrow. It is 5 1/2 months since I lost my hubbie, don`t apologise that`s what this site is all about and everything you`re feeling is normal. I know exactly how you feel, take a day at a time and look after yourself and your lovely kids. They`ll keep you going. This site has been great for me, keep posting, it really does help.

    Helen xxx

  • Thank you Helen.It was great of you to reply to my post .It means a lot to me to know i am not alone.

  • Hello everyone.  Hello especially to you Dave T.  I am so sorry to hear you have to join us but please keep posting.  This site is a life line for each of us and gets us through some terrible times when only someone else doing it can really understand.  Your kids will be your drive and energy to get you through tomorrow and all the days after tomorrow.  Take care of yourself and them.  We are all here when you need us.  Lots of love.  Ailsa xx

  • Dave, so sorry to hear about your beautiful Nic. Life is so unfair at times (((((((HUGS)))))).  It is quite understandable and normal to feel as though you are a non-funtioning human being. I believe it is nature's way of getting us through the initial stages of loss. My thoughts and prayers will be with you tomorrow.

    It is 33 weeks today since my dear husband Ray died and I miss him so very, very much. 

    I hope that everyone else is managing to get through the days without too much trauma.

    Ailsa as I sit here Ray  is staring out of his picture with a lovely quirky smile.  It makes me smile when I think of the happy time we had the day it was taken but very sad that he is no longer here.

    Take care everyone.   Love and angel hugs x x Patricia x x

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    Why would you want to "get over it" hold onto the memories and let them go at their own pace I really do think this is a sensible way to deal with them.

    don’t wallow in sorrow but don’t have a conscience over the times your sad either .could it be any different all that time together  I think the pressure to "get over it " is a misjudgment and puts unessarsery strain on your life.  I used to advocate the get over it as quick as pos routine but as i have thought about it i realise itys not the way to go with things like memouris

    Pete skipper

  • Hi Coralh,

    Just looked at site and looking for people who have similar experience. My husband died on the 2nd of October. Like you we were together for 33years and married for 30. How can we live without that person now? Sometimes I dont know how I feel. Sometimes I scream into my pillow, sometimes I just feel sad and sometimes I cope ok. I feel guilty when I feel ok (usually when Im with my lovely family and friends/ well sometimes) I dont know if sometimes I cant show emotion because it hurts too much to think??? How are you doing now? My sister in-law is coming to see me this morning as she was married to my brother for over 30years when he was killed in an accident. It is all wrong that these lovely people are no longer here. The thing is we are still young and there may be too many years without them and thats a lot to take in as we thought we would grow old together and used to laugh at what we would be like. If you feel like it I would appreciate contact.

     

    Caroline

  • Pete, I think that "getting over it" is probably not what she meant but hope do you come to terms with it and get on your with the life you now have?  Everyone is different and find their own level of acceptance at their own pace.

    Caroline, so sorry to hear of your sad bereavement. Please try not to feel guilty about enjoying the company of your family and friends. It is very difficult I know, but I feel certain thet your dear husband would not want you to go throught the rest of your life being sad and unhappy.  Give yourself time love, it is only early days yet.

    Keep posting on here and you will get lots of support if you want it.

    Love and angel hugs x x Patricia x x