My partner was diagnosed with womb cancer yesterday and I am in shock I think she has to have a full hysterectomy and they are also going to have " a dig around when in there "( docs words not mine he is amazing by the way ) as they are concerned that she may have other sites outside the womb, she has ore admission visit Friday chest scan Monday and then she will be in, I would really like to chat with someone about how I feel and offload to others in my position rather than being a blubbering wreck in front of my partner as she needs me to be strong

Hi Gay,

I'm really sorry to hear about your partner, and that no one has seen your post yet. This must be a very worrying time for you, and it must be very hard to feel that you have to be strong for your partner. I hope that you find that it helps to share things here in the Online Community. Please remember that if you ever need support or someone to talk to, you can also call our free Support Line (number below). 

Hiya Gay; My partner's diagnosis is quite diferent, but I completely understand your wanting to be strong, etc. My partner was pretty much in denial for the first month, and it drove me bananas not being able to talk about things and sort through feelings and get united against the common evil, as we tend to do. Eventually, I went to the website http://be.macmillan.org.uk/be/default.aspx and ordered some of their pamphlets, both for myself and for my partner. After reading the materials, my partner seemed to open up a lot. Since have some very open and honest conversations, my urge to weep has passed, as I know that through the worst imaginable, my partner is still just that and, although I cannot get the direct sort of care from him I used to do, the emotional stuff is often still intact. However, saying all that, posting troubles and worries here is fine, too. There are many people here to offer support and comeraderie through these difficult times. -- Eve

Dear Gay You are among friends here who understand. You two are on a long journey together. My husband has been ill for about seven years and although we, the family, were warned last Friday that it was the end he is still here and now planning his next trip! Your partner, like my husband, mayn't want to acknowledge the consequences of their disease as it may be their way of dealing with. It. My husband has never asked for a prognosis and at the marsden it isntngiven unless asked for, which seems to suit hm and drive him on. It isn't easy for me though as I have to keep bad news from him. A small laugh, our daughter saw the priest approach his CCU room last weekend and had to intercept him as she knew he would die if he saw the priest. Some people like to take an intelligent and proactive interest in their disease, my husband doesn't. You will soon see how your partner wants to engage. I hope so much that it is limited to her womb. The waiting is the worst of it. Once they start treatment you will both feel better. You will find the strength to deal with everything, Gay. Just now you don't want to but you will surprise yourself. Big hug and strength Sue X

Hi Eve Thankyou for your reply My partner now knows what they plan on doing She needs 4 surgeons in on the operation which is scheduled for 31st July and we have been told she will be operated on for approx 5-6 hours as they have to do extensive surgery due to her endriomettriosis which came as another shock they also said she may have a stoma. We are now waiting for the next two long weeks but have decided that we should do things to pass time and chill out its very difficult to get through a day at a time when she appears to not want to talk about it I know we will get there xxx

Thankyou Sue for your kind words I wish you much love for the future and truly hope the trip he is planning is enjoyed by you all as a family xxx

Hi again, Gay It's very important to have goals for the future. I am fairly certain this is what has kept the old boy going. If your partner wants to go that way then embrace it. Book things and you will be amazed butnyou will get there. Don't drown her in reality......and please try not to think too much yourself. Trust in her medical team and enjoy the moment........all clichés but the mind is so strong. This is all so terrifying for you and. If she doesn't want to accept things then good for her but you need to be extra strong as it is so tough tryingnto keep it all from someone who doesn't want to know. Bit of a red wine ramble, but for sure you get the gist. Big hugs for you two SueX