AND ANOTHER

2 minute read time.
How To Shower Like a Woman > > Take off clothes and place them sectioned in laundry basket according > to > lights and darks. > > Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown. > > If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas. > Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to > do more sit-ups / leg-lifts, etc. > > Get in the shower. > > Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and > pumice stone. > > Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added > vitamins. > > Wash your hair again to make sure it's clean. > > Condition your hair with grapefruit mint conditioner enhanced. > Wash your face with crushed apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes until > red. > > Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash. > Rinse > conditioner off hair. > > Shave armpits and legs. > > Turn off shower > > Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower. > > Spray mould spots with Tile cleaner. > > Get out of shower. > > Dry with towel the size of a small country > > Wrap hair in super absorbent towel. > > Return to bedroom wearing long dressing gown and towel on head. If you > see partner along the way, cover up any exposed areas. > > > > How To Shower Like a Man > > Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave them > in > a pile. > > Walk naked to the bathroom. > > If you see partner along the way, shake willy at her making the > 'woo-woo' sound. > > Look at your manly physique in the mirror. > > Admire the size of your willy and scratch your bum. > > Get in the shower. > > Wash your face. > > Wash your armpits. > > Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse them off. Fart > and > laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower. > > Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area. Wash > your > bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on the soap. > > Wash your hair. > > Make a Shampoo Mohican. > > Wee. > > Rinse off and get out of shower. > > Partially dry off. > > Fail to notice water on floor because curtain was hanging out of bath > the whole time. > > Admire willy size in mirror again. > > Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on. Return > to > bedroom with towel around waist. > > If you pass partner, pull off towel, shake willy at her and make the > 'woo-woo' sound again. > > Throw wet towel on bed. > > I KNOW YOU'RE LAUGHING BECAUSE IT'S TRUE!!!!!!
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