Depression is starting to rer its ugly head in a noticable way. I find I'm quite detached from the family in general, despite being with them 24/7. Everything irritates me. I don't want to go anywhere or get anything done. I'm eating like I don't know what. I want to cry but I feel like I'm too numb/exasperated to cry. More like I want to scream my lungs out, then go hide under a rock for the next millenia. I hate to admit it, but sometimes I have the very real desire to bite people. WTF? Must be an anxiety thing, right? I'm totally NOT a violent person. Guess a trip to the GP is in order.
Have to go over to John's brother's house for al fresco dining this afternoon. I am so unhappy about it. Firstly, the way I feel in general, secondly bro's wife has been saying horrible things to parents about them looking after the kids while I take John to chemo or radiotherapy or other appointments. Really giving it the big one - so much so that John's mom comes to me all upset over it. I could bitch slap her, but instead I have to go hang out at her house for a few hours listening to them talk rubbish and eye us up. I could just ggggggggggrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr in her face. :( !!!!!!!
Bedtime cannot come soon enough!
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